My Jacob and I: Our Imprinting Story
by thebeginnerwriter
Summary: A story about Renesmee and Jacob's life dealing with the fact he imprinted on her. They have to deal with love, confusion, struggle, and that's only the beginning.  Awful at summaries, please read!   Rated T for later chapters
1. History Lessons

**A/N: Hey guys! This is my second fanfiction dealing with Renesmee and Jacob. I was writing the other story, but I decided that I liked this story better. I hope that you enjoy it! *I do NOT own any of the characters, & I am not Stephenie Meyer. * Read & Review please to tell me if you like it, and want more chapters! (: thank you! **

One hundred and seventy four. That is how many questions my father has asked me about the Civil War, and he is only warming up. I flip the pages of my World History textbook quickly, not reading a word in it. Instead, I am wishing that I was playing outside with my best friend, Jacob Black.

"Renesmee," My father warns, as he listens to my thoughts drifting. "Please read your assignment. There will be fifty questions after."

Sometimes I wish that he didn't home school me, because he is extremely strict, but I refuse to go to a normal school. I would rather spend about three hours a day studying, than eight hours away from my family. I read a sentence, but my thoughts linger on the thought of the hot sun on my skin instead of this cold granite countertop.

"Studying history?" My mom's voice echoes through the kitchen, as she walks gracefully to us. She gives Dad a peck on the cheek, and then places a kiss on my head.

I look up at her with my deep brown eyes, and pout my lips like I did when I was little. "Can I please have a break? I'm _thirsty._"

"Sure sweetie," My mom says with a grin, and pulls her straight brown hair over one shoulder. "I'll take you hunting."

My dad looks up from the textbook, and raises an eyebrow at her. "Love, we are in the middle of the Civil War."

"The Civil War can wait," She says gently, placing her hands on his shoulder. "She does have an eternity to learn about it."

He smiles a crooked smile, and kisses her hand. "Of course, but we will be learning it eventually."

I cross my arms, and roll my arms. If I used the "we have forever" line, he would have took that as a challenge, and made me study longer. He looks over at me, and I can tell that he read my thoughts. He just laughs lightly, kisses my mom goodbye, and then walks out of the kitchen.

"Are you ready?" She asks as she slides open the glass door that leads to the dozens of acres that we now own.

I nod, and then with that we run, full speed, out the door and into the sunlight.

About thirty minutes later, I am finish eating the large elk I found and I look around the forest. In between the trees I find my mom feeding off of another elk. When she is finished, she stands up, and then pats her throat. "Are you ready to return home?"

"Yes," I say with a smile, and when she is about to run, I grab her arm. "Do you think we could walk some? I wanted to talk."

She grins widely, and places her hand on my shoulder comfortingly, "Of course, sweetie. What did you want to talk about?"

"Do you ever miss Forks?" I ask her, as we start walking slowly the back we came.

We had to move to New Hampshire when I turned seven because that is when I stopped aging. The rest of the family thought that they had been there too long and that they would return when most people were…gone.

"I do," She says with a sad smile, and I can see waves of emotions as they are displayed on her face. "I miss Charlie. I miss the house that I lived in when I met your father. I miss the place where your father and I married, and where we had you."

The breath in my throat catches, as I realize how much she left. "I'm so sorry, Mom."

"Don't be," She tells me, as she continues to look forward, into the trees. "I have my family and that is all that matters to me."

I'll be sixteen in a few months, and that means that we have been gone nine years. That is a long time to be away from your father, and memories that were so precious to you. "Can you tell me the story of you and Dad before you had me, again?"

"From the beginning?" She asks me, and I just nod, waiting for her to continue. "I saw him at school, and I noticed there was something different about him. I just couldn't place it then. He would leave school for 'camping trips', and when he was gone I already felt like something was missing from me. One day, he stopped a car from hitting me in the school parking lot."

Dad tells me that his life didn't start until he met my mom, but I never knew how much of an effect he had on her from the begging. Like a perfect love story.

"I became curious, and started asking questions that he never answered. I decided that I would take it into my own hands, so one night someone told me the old legends. I look more into it, and I slowly started piecing everything together. I knew he was a vampire, but it didn't scare me." She says with a smile, as she tries to push through the blur of her human memories. I can tell that she focused on keeping these ones, the clearest. "We became closer when I found out, but something that brought us closer is something that your father has a hard time dealing with. A vampire named James stalked me, and almost killed me."

"But Dad saved you," I finish that part of the story for her, and she just smiled down at me.

"Yes he did." She said, her mind getting lost in her thoughts. "We became even closer, and everything was going great until my eighteen birthday party. I was injured, but it wasn't anything- to me at least. Your dad, decided it would be best for me if he left, so he did." Her voice became tighter. "Those six months was the lowest time in my life, Nessie. I found someone in my life then that could make me smile, though. He didn't heal my wounds, but he helped cover them."

I've never heard this part of the story before. "Who was he?"

"Jacob." Suddenly, her face became sad, and she stopped in her tracks. "That isn't my story to tell, Nessie. If you want to know, and if he is willing to tell you, you should ask him later."

How did Jacob fit in the story? I knew that Jacob and Mom were friends when they were younger, and reconnected when she moved back to Forks. I just never wondered how they became as close as they were now. If they were friends, then what kept him here? Surely he wouldn't just stay so he could talk to her every other day. It had to be something else, but what?

"You look like your brain is going to explode," My mom says as she wraps her arm around my shoulder. "Don't worry."

I pull one of my bronze curls out from in front of my face, and I tuck it behind my ear. "Keep going with your story. I want to get to the happy ending."

"Edward heard that I was dead, and so he decided that he wanted to kill himself, too. Alice found me in time though, so we raced to Italy to try to save him from making an awful mistake. I didn't care if he didn't care for me at the time; I just wanted him to be safe." She says, as I can almost hear tears in her throat. "Here is the happy ending, though. When he got back we promised each other that we would get married, and then before I knew it I was married to the love of my life. You came short after, and you know the rest."

Their loved seemed so true and real, that I could only hope to have a love as great as theirs one day. "Does Dad still think your scent is addicting?"

"Yes," She says happily. I knew that that was one thing that they were worried about when he turned her into a vampire.

I think of Jake's scent, "I wonder if it's the same why I think about Jake."

"What do you mean?" She asks me curiously, as she gracefully jumps over a log.

I shrug my shoulders, as I try to find a way to explain it. Instead, I just place my hand on her face, using my gift, and show her the way he smells to me. I show her different times when he would walk up to me, and I would notice the way he smelled like the woods, and I showed her how Aunt Rose's reaction was completely different than mine. When I am done, I drop my hand from her, "I can barely stand to be away from him, and when I do I feel like I'm a puzzle and most pieces are missing."

"I guess it's something like that," She says with a small smile escaping her lips. "Don't worry, honey, you are only fifteen. You have a long time to figure out everything." I glance up at her, and she rolls her eyes. "I know you think and look about eighteen years old, but Nessie, you have only been mine for fifteen years. I don't want to lose you yet."

I raise my eyebrows, as I try to understand what she just said. "What do you mean you 'don't want to lose me yet'? You will never lose me, Mom."

"Nothing, sweetie, just a mother's worry, I guess." She says, but avoids looking into my eyes. I feel like there is more behind it than that answer, but I already dragged so much out of her today so I drop it.

"Race me back?" I ask her with a smile, and then we run quickly back to the house.

During the whole run I was trying to decide what I had learned from the talk with her. I knew that Jacob means a lot to her, because he helped her when she most needed him. I just don't know what 'helping her out' really means. I also realized that for some reason I am attached to Jacob, and whenever he is away, I don't feel like myself. Finally, I know that my mom is afraid of losing me too quickly, but to what?

When we arrived back to our house, Mom went into the main room to listen to Dad play the piano for her. I decide to not go in just yet, because I don't feel like being quizzed on the Cold War again today. Besides, I haven't seen Jacob since this morning, and I miss him. I figure since I wasn't home, that Jacob would be in his cabin that Alice built him when he moved here so he would feel more comfortable.

About a mile away from our house, I can hear the clink of the tools as they land on the garage floor. Of course he would be working on the 1987 Jeep Wrangler he bought from a junk yard a few weeks ago. Why does that even surprise me? He works on them whenever he has free time. Either that or he changes into a wolf and runs around property.

I tip toe into the garage, and the radio blasting makes it possible for me to enter without him noticing. I come up to the car, that he has lifted on some wood since the wheels aren't on yet, and all I can see are his legs sticking out the side.

"Boo!" I yell, as I grab his ankles, causing him to jump.

I hear a thud, and laughter coming up from under the car. His hands grab the outside of the car, and he wheels the skateboard that he has been laying on, out from under it. "Dang, Ness, you got me pretty good that time."

"Sorry," I manage to say between giggling. "Did you hit your head?"

He rubs the top of his head through his short, spiky brown hair, "Werewolf, remember? I heal easily."

"Yeah," I say finally calming down, and remembering the talk that I had with my mom earlier. I sit on the cement, pull my legs close to my chest, and I try to think of what I want to say.

Jake sits up, and gets a rag out of his pocket to wipe the grease off of his hands. "What's wrong, Ness?"

"Nothing," I say lightly, but I know that he can tell when I'm lying. "How did you and my mom become so close again?"

His dark brown eyes go wide, and he starts mumbling. I guess my question caught him off guard. "Did your parents approve of me telling you?"

"Mom told me I could ask you, and that you could tell me. Only if you wanted to, though." I tell him, half afraid that he wouldn't tell me, and half afraid that he would.

He moved back and forth on the skateboard for a minute, pushing himself with his feet. I let him decide what he wanted to tell me, and as he thought I saw the pain in his eyes. "Before I tell you this, I want you to know that that was the past. Do you understand?"

"Yes," I whisper so low so I could barely hear myself say it. What was it that he wanted to tell me, and was it that bad?

He bit his lip for a few seconds, took a deep breath, and then finally spoke. "When Edward left Bella, she was crushed. I have never seen anyone so depressed in my life. I slowly became her friend, and she would come over and help me build a couple of motorcycles. Then…" His voice trailed off, and I could see the struggle as he tried to choose the next words carefully.

"It's okay, Jacob. You are my best friend, and nothing is going to change that." I tell him with a shaking voice, as I place my hand on his knee for a second. "I promise." No matter how awful this news is, and no matter how angry I might be. I would still end up forgiving him in the end, I just knew it.

Different ideas pop up into my mind as I wait for him to say something. None of them are comforting to me. I watch as he raises his hand, and places it on mine. "I fell in love with her. I didn't mean to, it just sort of happened. I kissed her twice. Once time she punched me, and broke her hand."

"You kissed my mom?" I say out loud, making sure I heard him right.

I feel his hand grab mine tighter, "Yes. She loved me, I know she did. But that didn't make any difference, she had always picked Edward."

"I'm so sorry," I say, as I feel a tear run down my face. For some reason, the fact that he kissed my mom didn't make me angry. Just grossed out. The only reason I'm crying is because I can't imagine going through the pain that Jacob went through. Loving someone so much, and watching them pick someone else. I can't stand to see Jacob go through any pain, and knowing that he went through his much kills me.

He pulls his head up slowly, and looks into my eyes. "What are you sorry for?"

"You must have been in so much pain," I say feeling the tears continue to roll down my face. "I'm sorry."

He shook his head, as he lifted me off the ground and onto his lap. "Nessie, don't be sorry. It hurt then, but it doesn't hurt me anymore."

"Why did you stay? All this time, watching her be with him." I say as he wipes off the tears with his thumb.

He uses one hand to smooth down my hair, and we sit in silent until he feels that he can tell me. "Love changes, Ness. I thought that she was the love of my life, but then it turned out to be nothing in compare to what true love feels like."

I try to process what he said, as he rocks me back and forth in his large arms. It's a couple of minutes before I ask, "Jake, do you think I will fall in love with someone one day?"

"I hope you do," He says, and I look up to his smiling face that is looking down at me. "He will be a lucky guy, Nessie."

I wrap my arms around his waist, as I pull him into a tight hug. He knows how to make me feel better in just a few words. "Thanks, Jake. You are the best friend anyone could have."


	2. Best Friends

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry this chapter is very short, but I'm just leading up to bringing the story deeper into the story line! (: thanks for reading! Please review! (Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, and I am not Stephenie Meyer. Plus, I do not own the song: 'A Place in This World' by Taylor Swift. All rights go to her and her record company and whoever else owns the song (: )**

"_I'm just a girl, trying to find my place in this world!" _Jake belts a Taylor Swift song into the video game microphone, his voice about three octaves higher than his normal one.

I can't stop laughing as the song comes up to a guitar solo, so I mess up on a few notes. "It's your fault I'm messing up, Jacob." I say playfully, as he goes back to singing in a girly voice.

"_Oh, I'm just a girl…" _Jake sings lightly as the song fades out, and then he can't hold the laughter anymore. "I can't believe you picked that song for me."

I laugh as loud as him, and I fall down on the long brown couch in Jake's small living room, "You sounded great!"

"You are just jealous," He says folding his arms across his chest, and sits on the other side of the couch. We continue laughing, and we have to wait a few minutes before we calm down. "I'm officially too tired for this video game. How about we pop in a movie?"

I nod slowly, showing I agree, and then I hop off of the couch. "I'll make the popcorn, if you pick out the movie?"

"Sounds good to me," He tells me, and then makes his way to the DVD cabinet that Alice added for him a few years ago when we had to keep visiting our house for movies.

I make my way into his kitchen, open the cabinet door next to the microwave, and then throw it in. Through the glass I watch it spin around, and it leaves me with time to think. So much has happened since last week when I talked to Jake about him and my mom. He acts like a huge burden has been lifted off of his shoulders, and my parents came to talk to me about it the day after. They both seem relived about the way I understood it.

The beep to the microwave makes me jump, as it pulls me back to reality. I grab the hot bag out of the microwave, and I sit it down as I get a bowl out of the pantry. It's crazy how much money my family spend on Jacob. They gave him his own quaint house, and it was far enough so my dad couldn't hear his thoughts. Why are they so nice to him (despite dog jokes from Aunt Rose, but Jake always has a good comeback), and why does he stick around? What is keeping him here?

"Nessie, you okay in there?" I hear Jake's voice come in front the living room, and I quickly pour the popcorn into the bowl, and then carry it out into the room. "Smells delicious."

I roll my eyes, as I sit next to him on the couch, and hand him the bowl. "It's only popcorn, Jake."

"It's still amazing," He says through a mouth full of popcorn.

I grab a few pieces, and I put one into my mouth, "What movie did you pick tonight?"

"Some action movie we haven't seen before," He tells me as he grabs the remote with his buttery hand, "The cover looked cool."

By the middle of the movie I could feel my eyelids drooping, as I struggled to stay awake. Jake, who seemed very interested in the movie, watched the screen intently. I can never stay awake through action movies, I prefer something that can make me laugh. In a few minutes I feel my strength in fighting this battle disappear, as I lay my head down on his warm shoulder, and fall asleep.

I wake up to Jacob placing me into my bed, and wrapping the covers around me. I keep my eyes closed, because I'm still too tired. I haven't gotten a lot of sleep lately, and it's been catching up with me. I feel him brush away my curly hair, and then he goes away.

"Goodnight, Nessie." He whispers only a few inches from my face, and then places his lips on my forehead. "Sweet dreams."

I raise my eyelids a little when I hear his footsteps go down the stairs, and I lay there staring at the ceiling. He carried me all the way from his cabin a few miles away from here, just to carry me to bed. I feel so safe in his arms, and I wonder if it's the same for him. He protects me like I am his sister, and it makes me feel loved. I'm so glad that I can call Jacob my best friend.


	3. What Just Happened?

**A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for reading! I hope that this chapter isn't too boring in the beginning! Please read & review! I love people who review! (: (Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I do not own the characters) **

Last night, when Jacob visited to hang out with my family and I, he said that he was running out of food at his house (surprise, surprise), and that he would have to eat breakfast over here. Esme gave me recipes for blueberry muffins/pancakes, bacon, and eggs (I'm know how to make them, but just to be sure I get them perfect), and told me that I could try cooking it since I might have to cook every day for myself someday.

These past few years, Esme has enjoyed teaching me how to make everything from breakfast foods to desserts, and it has come in handy. Since Jake eats like an animal (ha), I have to make a lot of food. I love cooking, so I don't mind helping Esme whenever she cooks (it's become a hobby of hers, since she know has two people who actually eat human food).

"Morning Ness," Jake greets me with a bear hug, as I enter the kitchen.

"How long have you been here?" I ask him, as I look in a drawer for the recipes.

He walks into the pantry, and comes out with two aprons. "I just arrived when you came down. Esme let me in."

"Okay, well lets get started." I tell him, as I place three different sheets of paper onto the counter. I turn around, and I see him tying a pink polka doted apron around his neck. I told him that he could only help me cook if he wore one, but I was just kidding. I start laughing, "Sorry, we don't have any other ones."

He shrugs, as he finishes tying the knot, "Are you saying this makes me look fat?" He says laughing, and then walks over to the counter.

"No, not at all." I say still laughing, and I separate the recipes so he can see them. I tie my apron around my floral spring dress that falls just about my knees, and I look over to him. "What do you want to make this morning?"

He places his hands on them, as if this was a huge decision that he was making. "How about the blueberry pancakes?"

"Sounds good to me," I say with a smile, and then I turn around and place a frying pan on the stove. "So lets get all the ingredients."

Within a few minutes we have gathered: flour, baking powder, salt, sugar, eggs, butter, and the blueberries. Jake stares at all of the ingredients, and he seems overwhelmed. "The only time I made pancakes was from the mix."

"It's alright, I know how." I tell him, and then I scoot the flour, baking powder, salt, and sugar at him. "Put how much the recipe calls for each into this bowl." I hand him a large white bowl, and he puts it in front of him on the counter. "I'll mix the other ingredients, while you do that."

In the next few minutes Jake has managed to get flower all over the counter, "I think I finished it." He tells me, showing me the bowl full of the dry ingredients.

"It looks ready," I tell him with a smile, and he grins widely. I take my bowl over to where he is, and I pour it on top of his ingredients. "Now mix those together."

He looks at me like I'm crazy, "How come we didn't just mix them all together in the first place?"

"Who knows? I am just following the recipe." I say, holding it up and flicking the sheet of paper. "Can you mix them?"

He nods, and then starts mixing them slowly so no more flour will fall out of the bowl. I turn the heat under the frying pan to medium, as Jacob finishes stirring. "I think it's ready." He carries the bowl over to me, and I stick a big spoon into the mix.

"Just pour a little bit into the pan," I tell him, and then he pours the perfect amount in. "I'll do the rest." I sprinkle the blueberries into the pancake, and when it is cooked enough, I flip it to its other side.

For the first twenty pancakes he just watches me, studying how I lift the pan, and make the pancake spin up in the air, and have it land on the other side. "Did you want to try?"

"Sure," He says as he takes the glove off of my hand, and puts it on his so he won't get burned. "So I just shake it?" He attempts, and it goes flying behind our heads, which sends us into a hysterical laughter.

I walk back with the bad pancake, which I got off of the floor across the room, and I put it into the trash can. "That was just your first try. When Esme first taught me, I hit Emmet in the back of the head as he walked into the room."

"Okay good, I thought I was the only one who sucked at it." He tells me, and then he sticks his tongue out of his mouth as he focuses on making the pancake flip.

After a few failed attempts, he finally got it down, and started doing more pancakes. After getting twenty good ones, he places the empty bowl of mix on the counter. "I think I'm a pro now."

"Oh yes," I say laughing, as I take a plate filled with the pancakes, and he grabs forks and plates for us. "I think that they look very good."

Four pancakes later, I push my plate far away from me showing I was done. "You did a great job making them."

"It was mostly you," He says as she shovels his twentieth pancake into his mouth. When he is done eating, he picks up the plates, and carries them back to the sink.

I take them from his hands, and then I place them into the sink. "I'll clean the bowls and plates first, and then I will help you clean up all of the flour over there."

"Alright," He says, and then turns around to the messy countertops. I have just finished cleaning off the first plate when I feel a nudge against my back. I turn around to see Jacob with his hands cupped together, holding flour, and a big grin on his face.

"Jacob, you don't dare!" I scream loudly, but it's too late.

Suddenly all I can see is the white flour as it is blown into my face, and my first reaction is to grab the sink sprayer that is right behind me. Before he can do anything, I spray it onto his shirt and face. I laugh, as the shock spreads across his face, and I feel like I have won this war. That thought is proved wrong, though, when I realize I am too close to him to get away from his long, strong arms. He grabs me on the waist, turning me the other way, my back pulled against the front of him as he reaches for the sprayer.

With my free hand, I reach up to my face, wipe the flour off, and then reach my hand backwards to wipe it onto his face. "Oh no you don't," He says laughing, and then grabs my waist and turns me so that I am facing him.

I look up into his eyes, our faces just inches away. Suddenly, with no warning, I feel an electrical current run through my body, and I freeze. I can feel his wet shirt soaking me, and I just continue to stare into his eyes. It isn't uncomfortable, it's actually the opposite. In this moment I feel like every vein in my body is screaming for him, but my body tenses up, waiting to see any change in him. Suddenly, his muscles tense up, and then he lets go quickly, leaving a foot in between us.

He just stares at me with his dark brown eyes, and doesn't look away. I can feel my cheeks turn red, as we stand there not saying a word. Finally Jake runs a hand through his hair, "Thanks for breakfast. I've, uh, got to get home."

I just stand there, not moving, as he walks out of the house. When he is gone, I feel my face burning, and I run up the stairs heading to my room.

What had just happened down there? I wonder as I shut my door quickly, and then fall into my bed. I am just so confused. Those feelings I had for Jacob, my best _friend,_ were not something a friend would feel for a friend. I've never felt about Jake that way before, but I couldn't get the thoughts to leave my head. Did he feel that same current that went through my body? Did he want me to stay in his arms forever, like I wanted to in that moment? I tried to shake away the idea, but it wouldn't budge. What was wrong with me? This is my best friend, Jacob Black, I am talking about. Not some boy that I could have a crush on. I couldn't like, Jake, could I? I shove my face into my pillow, and I can feel my tears as they run rapidly down my cheeks.

My thoughts are interrupted by a knock on the door, and I can hear my parent's voices on the other side of it saying my name. Oh no, they are going to think I'm so weird because I am thinking of Jake that way! Without my permission, they come in, shutting the door behind them, and then they sit at the end of the bed.

_I'm not in the mood for talking, Dad. _I think instead of saying, because I think my tears would stop me. I feel like an idiot for crying over this, but everything has been so overwhelming lately. I hardly understand anything anymore.

"Honey, you are not an idiot." Dad says, as he places his cold hand onto my back. "Why don't you tell us what happened?"

_Don't you already know? _I ask him rudely, as I become more embarrassed because he heard my thoughts. All of them.

I can hear him slightly laughing, but deciding that this wasn't the time. "Yes, I know your thoughts about it, Nessie. Your mother needs to know."

I don't feel like leaving my mother out of the loop after all she has done for me, so after a few minutes of silence I remember I can do something easier than talking. I just don't want her to make fun of me, but hopefully she won't. With a sigh, I lift my arm from underneath my head, and I sit up, not looking at them yet. I place my hand onto her cheek, and I start the memory from him blowing the flour into my face, up to when they knocked on the door.

"Renesmee," My mom's voice is soothing, as she pulls me in close to her. "Don't ever think that I will make fun of you for anything you do. Not ever." She wipes my tears away, and then rests her hands on my legs. "Sweetie, having feelings toward a boy is completely normal."

"Not towards Jacob! He is going to think I am a freak!" I say soft enough so I can pretend that everyone else in the house isn't listening. Even though I know they are.

She shakes her head quickly, and pulls my chin up so I have to look at her in the eyes. "Give it time, honey. I know that he will be the last one who judges you about your feelings."

"Thanks, but I don't feel like talking about this just yet." I say with a weak smile, "I'm not quite sure what I am feeling right now."

Dad pulls my head to his, and gives me a kiss on the forehead. "Love you, Renesmee."

"I'm here if you need me," Mom tells me, as she hugs me tightly.

Three hours later, I am tossing and turning in my bed, trying to get some sleep. I'm not going to try to deal with all of my thoughts today. Even though it is only the afternoon, I need some rest. Questions keep popping into my head, and I can't seem to shut them out. They keep nagging at me, until my brain has finally had enough, and I slip into a dream. A dream about Jacob.


	4. Silence

**A/N: (Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, and I am not Stephenie Meyers.) Hey! (: I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! I have fun writing it! Please read and REVIEW! It means a lot! (: **

This morning, after waking up multiple times last night, I lay in my bed as the questions drilled into my head. I forced myself to try to sleep through the whole day yesterday, just so I didn't have to think. I can't let the questions keep suffocating me, otherwise I might go crazy. After a long, cold shower, I headed downstairs to find Uncle Emmett and Uncle Jasper watching a basketball game on the flat screen in the living room.

All of my stress seemed to slip away, as I sat on the empty couch staring blankly at the TV. I glanced at Uncle Jasper, and he just winked. I've got to remember to thank him for that, because that was the only time today I hadn't been worrying.

It's already eight o'clock at night, and Jacob hasn't show up here at all today. Usually he will visit multiple times, or even stay the whole day. Instead of spending the day with him, I'm vacuuming the floor of my bedroom for the fifth time, hoping that the noise will block out my thoughts.

I sigh heavily, as I place the vacuum into the cleaning supplies closet, after it didn't work to keep the confusing thoughts out of my head. I walk downstairs to find all of my family sitting down in the living room, discussing something quietly. They all turn to me, smiling, hoping that they will get a smile out me as well. I can tell that they know something is up, because I haven't been out of my room like at all today, and that isn't like me. Instead of smiling I just nod my head, and continue through the many rooms of the house. I find the book room, which is located next to the front door, and I sit down on the tan loveseat that is sitting across from a long couch.

"Maybe if I find a book, it will distract me," I mumble out loud to myself, as I take out a small book out of the large shelves filled with almost every book each Cullen has ever read. It's crazy how big this room is.

I look up from the book, after I get distracted during the first chapter. How come I am stressing so much about this? It might have been nothing last night. I could have made it up with my imagination.

"Hey Renesmee," Jacob's voice sounds tighter than normal, as he walks into the room. He almost never calls me Renesmee, only when something is wrong.

Maybe it wasn't just my imagination.

"Uhm, hello Jacob," I say trying not to look up from the book.

He sits down in the couch that is across from mine. Usually he would just sit next to me, but this isn't that Jacob. This is a Jacob that is guarded.

"I was let in by Edward," He tells me as he looks around the room, "So have you been in here all day?"

He is trying to make small talk. He never would have done that! He would have talked to me, and not just to kill time. What is going on with him? "No, I've been cleaning a little bit. What have you been doing?"

"I worked on my Jeep, and I phased and ran a while." He tells me, and then there is an awkward silence that fills this room. If it had been yesterday morning, the silence wouldn't feel awkward. What has happened to us?

I nod, and close my book. If he wasn't going to try, I have to right? "Did you need help on your Jeep?"

"Not right now, thanks though." He says, and then he looks down at his hands. "I'm going to go visit La Push in a few days."

I could see his eyes look up quickly to see my reaction, but I just smile brightly. "That would be great, Jake. We, I mean you, haven't been back since New Year's last year! It will be nice for you to see Billy and the pack again." Every time that he visits La Push, he always invites me, but he only said 'I'm' in his sentence. "How long will you be gone?"

"I don't know yet," He says, only looking up at me when he is done talking.

I just nod, and then I run my hand through my locks of curls. "It should be a good time for you to go."

Jake just looks up at me, and nods. I don't think that he has smiled once. He just watches me for a while, and I go back to reading the book. I just stare at the pages of the book, hoping that the words will distract me. His eyes don't leave me, and I wonder if he thinks that I am some sort of freak now.

A knock on the door causes me to look up, and my dad is now standing in the room, "Renesmee, you need to go to bed, since you didn't get any sleep last night."

"Okay," I tell him as I leave the book down on the couch. I can tell that that isn't the reason, but he heard how I felt like Jake didn't want me, so Dad thought he would come save me. Before leaving the room, I turn around to Jake looking at my dad. "Night, Jake." Even though I feel like he is judging me, I don't want to leave him.

"Good night, Renesmee." He tells me, not taking his eyes off of my dad.

My dad places his hand on my back as he leads me out of the room. He turns his head around quickly, "You can go home, Jake. Get some sleep."

I wait until I'm in my room with Dad before I speak. "He doesn't like me anymore." I say as I struggle to fight back the tears. "That one moment last morning completely ruined our friendship."

Before he can say anything, Mom walks into the room, and places her hands on Dad's back, "Let me talk to her." He doesn't argue, he just kisses her on the forehead, and then leaves the room. "What's wrong, baby?"

"Jacob thinks that I'm some sort of freak." I tell her, looking down at my hands ashamed. "I ruined our friendship."

She shushes me, and she grabs my hands between her cold fingers. "I know him, Renesmee, and he does _not _think you are freak. It is not your fault that this awkward tension is between you and him."

"I don't even know why I felt that with him!" I say softly, as I search her golden eyes for answers. She has always has given me the best advice, but she is looking at me like she doesn't know what to say. Like it isn't her place to tell me. "I see him as my best friend, but he doesn't even want to talk to me."

She pulls me into a hug, and rubs her hand on my back. "He wants to talk to, Nessie. Maybe he feels like you don't want to talk to him now. He is still going to be your best friend, and he will always be."

"I have to talk to him, don't I?" I ask her as I pull back from her, and I look her in the eyes.

"If that is what your heart is telling you," She says pointing a finger to where my heart is, "Then yes."

I sigh, realizing that I have to talk to him, and if I don't things might become worse. "Thanks, Mom. I think I'm going to head down to his cabin."

"I'll be here, with everyone else, when you come back. We love you so much." She kisses me on the forehead quickly, and then pulls me off of my bed. "Just remember how good of friends you are with him."

It's only been about 24 hours since the last time I was really with Jacob, and I already missed him. I need my best friend. "Okay, thanks. I love you."

After I tell Dad where I am going, I slowly make my way to his cabin. Each step I take, my breath becomes shortened, as I can feel the nerves become worse. What if he doesn't want to talk to me anymore? Maybe he realized there is nothing here in New Hampshire for him, and he is going back to live in La Push forever. That means I'll have to live an eternity without him. I can't even go a day without him, how am I supposed to live like that forever?

"Renesmee?" A familiar deep voice asks about one hundred feet away, and I already know who it is before I jerk my head up. Jacob is standing between a few trees, with his usual outfit on: old, ripped jean shorts and nothing else.

I become frozen where I am, as he keeps walking closer to me. I clear my throat, "Oh hey Jake, I was just going to meet you in your house. What are you doing out here?"

"I never went home after I left your house. I've been out here debating whether I was going to go visit you or not," He tells me, as he puts his hands in his front pockets.

For some reason it's almost impossible to lie to each other. He was going to come see me. "Jake I have some things to tell you."

"No," He says as he gets a few feet away from me, "Let me go first." I shut my mouth, as I wait for him to continue. "I hate not talking to you. I don't know what happened last night, but it's not a reason for us to completely stop talking to each other." I sigh thankfully as I realize that I am closer to having my best friend back. "What's wrong, Ness?" He asks me, as he places his hands on my shoulders.

I just wrap my hands around his waist, "I've missed you," I whisper into his chest.

"I've missed you, too," He tells me as he wraps his arms around me. "Not talking to you was killing me."

His warmth surrounds me, as I realize I don't want to leave his comforting arms. "Why weren't you talking to me?"

"I don't know, Nessie," He tells me, and I can hear his heart start beating faster in his chest. He takes in a deep breath, and then slowly lets it out. "I guess I got scared. I don't know of what, but all I know is that I still want to be your best friend."

I pull back from his chest, still keeping my arms wrapped around his waist. "I don't want you to stop being my best friend. Can we just forget about whatever happened yesterday morning?"

"Sure," He says with a smile, and then kisses the top of my head. "I'm still going to go to La Push. I have a plane ticket for tomorrow."

Suddenly, my breath becomes stuck in my throat. He is still leaving me. I can't let it show that I don't want him to go, though, or he won't leave. I know that he wants to go see his family and friends, but he won't want to see me in any pain. "How long are you going?"

"Two weeks," He whispers, as he pulls me into a tighter hug. "I'll be there for the fourth of July, and then I'll come back the eleventh."

He'll be gone from the twenty-seventh in June all the way up to July eleventh. That is the longest time I've ever spent away from him. I don't know if I'll be able to handle it, but I have to tell him its okay. "Tell everyone I say hi."

"I will," He says sadly, and then kisses me on the head once again. "I'll call every day, I promise. I'll be back before you know it. I doubt you'll even miss me."

It will be like half of me is missing, and he knows that. "I can't wait until you come back."

"I'll see you in two weeks," He says as he looks me into the eyes, and stares at me for a few minutes. I can see the pain in his eyes, and I know that he doesn't want to leave me either. But he has to. "I love you."

I bring a small smile to my lips, but it doesn't reach my eyes. "I love you, Jake."

He releases me from his grip, and then backs up slowly. With one last look, he smiles to me, and then turns around, walking away from me.


	5. Why Family Matters

**A/N**: **(Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I do not own these characters.) I hope that you guys enjoy this chapter! Thank you for the awesome reviews & please continue to review! (: **

It's only been three days since Jacob has left, and I can't even begin to describe the pain I'm feeling. I feel _empty. _Ever since he's left, my family has been trying to comfort me by hanging out with me, trying to take my mind off of him. A few times I found myself pushing him into the back of my mind, but the fact that he is far away kept nagging at me. I'm used to being able to run to Jacob whenever I felt hurt or scared, but now he is back at his original home. What if he isn't missing me? He has his best friends, his pack, and his family there. All he has here is me and my family. He would be crazy to miss this. I have to stop thinking about him, because if I keep dwelling on the fact that he is gone, his trip will feel longer than it really is. Two weeks only feels like a few days when you have forever to live. But a few days is still a long time to go without seeing your best friend.

"Renesmee?" Alice's worried voice snaps me back into reality, as I continue to stare up into the beautiful night stars. "You've been out here for hours. Do you want to come back in?"

I just continue to stare at the sparkling lights up above me, and lightly pat the ground next to me. Looking up into the night sky reminds me how small I am in this huge world. What can a half-human, half-vampire mean to anyone? I feel like don't belong anywhere. Every direction is pulling me, and I have no clue where I need to go.

"I miss you," Alice says as she takes my invitation, and lies on the grass next to me. "You don't seem like you are _here _anymore."

I take a deep breath, and then roll my head over to look into her eyes. She is looking at me worriedly, and I can tell that I am frightening her. "I'm okay. I just miss him."

"He is coming back," She tells me as she grabs my hand lightly, and gives it a comforting squeeze. "This could be a good break for the two of you. You've been with him almost every day since you were born."

I don't need to be away from him. I need to be with him. I need for him to comfort me, and tell me that everything will be okay even when I know it's not. "How would you feel if Uncle Jasper left you for two weeks?" Her whole face changes and I can see the pain in her eyes. I squeeze her hand tightly, "I know it's not exactly like that, since Jacob and I are only best friends, but he is such a big part of me."

"Honey, I know that it hurts to be away from him, but there are going to be times where you can't be with him all of the time." She waits a few seconds, as she tries to think of what to say. "The next time you see each other will be worth all of the pain of waiting for him to come back."

I roll my head back, and look up at the stars as I process what she is saying. The next time I see Jacob, I'll be able to run into his arms, and all of my pain will melt away. That's how it was when I was younger. Whenever I fell and scraped a knee, I would run to Jacob and he would make the pain going away. When I felt like a monster for hunting animals, I would go to him and he would say the things to make me feel better. He has always been my protector, and my older brother. Now he is my best friend, and I wish I could run to him and make him take away all of my hurting. He can't now, though, and I'm all alone.

"You aren't alone," My dad says as he lies down on the grass on the other side of me. "We are here for you. You'll always have your family."

I roll my eyes. It's just like my dad to read my thoughts, and come running to my rescue. "I know, Dad."

"He means it," Alice says as she turns her head to look at me. "We will always be here for you, Renesmee."

I know how lucky I am to have all of my family with me. I am surrounded by people who love me unconditionally. My grandparents, parents, and Aunt's and Uncle's would do anything for me. They have fought for me since I've entered this world, and I know most of them fought for me even when I was wasn't even born yet. They have each watched over me like I was their own, and I will never be able to thank them enough. "Thank you, guys."

"You can go to us for anything you need," Dad tells me, as he looks up into the stars. I know that he knows what is going on, but I'm just glad he isn't prying it all out of me.

A few minutes pass before Alice decides to ask, "So what's going on, Nessie?"

"Well," I say softly, as I try to think of what _isn't _going on in my life. I look and act basically eighteen years old, but everyone still treats me like I'm a kid. My best friend is thousands of miles away from me, and I miss him like crazy. I'm living with vampires, and my best friend is a werewolf. I'm half human, and half vampire, so I don't fit in with anyone, and I feel like some kind of freak. I take a deep breath, as I try to form it into words. I know I can trust them, but it's just hard to explain it. "Growing up is difficult."

I hear my dad chuckle quietly besides me, laughing at how I summed up all of my different feelings. I know that he was listening in my thoughts, as I tried to tell them what was going on in my life. "We don't see you as a kid as much as you think we do. I know that you have looked like older teenager since you were seven years old, but now you _are _a teenager. There is no denying it anymore. You have lived sixteen years, and even though they have gone by in a blink of an eye, you have grown up."

"You really think that?" I ask him, as I feel my eyes watering. They don't still imagine me as the little baby who crawled to them. I know that I'll always be their 'little girl', but now they understand that I am growing up. But how am I supposed to fully grow up when I am in the same situations my whole life?

My dad sighs, as he listens into my thoughts. "You have grown up these past sixteen years, trust me. I know that you might not feel like you have, but you handle situations well. You went to talk to Jacob after you had that one moment, and it took a very strong, mature person to do that. One day you will move on from us and live your own life, but we will always be here."

"It's scary to think that I'll be living my own life without you all here," I tell him as I try to think of a life where they aren't involved, and I can't.

He laughs lightly, and grabs my hand quickly. "Don't worry. We will worry about that when it comes."

"Renesmee? Alice? Edward?" My mom asks as she walks out of the Cullen house, and to the ground that we are all laying at. "I was beginning to worry you forgot about us."

My dad lets go of my hand, and grabs my mom as she lies next to him on the ground. He wraps his arms around her, and kisses her head. "We've just been talking, love."

"I hope it wasn't about me!" A deep voice booms, as I hear Uncle Emmett walking up to us. He lies down next to my mom on the grass, and I hear Aunt Rose as she lies next to him.

I hear three new sets of footsteps; Jasper and Grandma Esme and Grandpa Carlisle join our line. Uncle Jasper lies next to Alice, and then Esme and Carlisle lie next to them. Before I know it, my whole family is having small talk as we gaze up at the sky. Carlisle points out different star formations in the dark sky, and I find my thoughts drifting.

My family is surrounding me, trying to make me feel better, and I realize that it is working. They laugh at different jokes, as I continue to stare upwards. Even though Jacob is still on my mind and I miss him, I know that I'll get to see him soon. I have my family here to comfort me, and even though they can't give me Jacob's warmth and his kind personality, I know that they can help me.

"By the way Esme," Uncle Emmett says, causing everyone to become quiet. "Edward broke the wooden coffee table."

Esme gasps and everyone becomes quiet. "EDWARD!" The last time that my dad and Emmett were wrestling, they broke one of Esme's favorite lamps. Everyone was sure to be careful from then on out. Esme doesn't joke around when it comes to her furniture.

"What? He tipped the whole couch that I was resting on, and flipped me onto it!" My dad says timidly.

I laugh lightly, seeing my dad becoming so scared suddenly. Emmett just laughs loudly, "You could have read my mind to see what I was going to do!"

"I was reading your mind!" My dad says defensively, trying to put all of the blame on Emmett. "All I heard was you singing the ABC's! I just figured you forgot them!"

Everyone bursts into laughter, and I join with them. It's been the first time I've laughed in a few days, and it feels good. A few more wise cracks come from my family, and I find myself clutching my stomach as I try to breathe, because I've been laughing so hard. I know that they will be here to catch me whenever I need them.


	6. Jacob Calls

**A/N: (Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I do not own the characters.) Hey! (: Thanks for keeping up with me this far! I'm excited to continue writing this story. Your reviews keep me motivated, so thank you so much! Please keep reviewing, & I hope that you enjoy this chapter! **

"Are you excited about the fireworks that we are going to do tomorrow?" Alice asks me as we drive down the road, returning home from our all day shopping trip. We got new outfits for the whole family and new dresses for all the girls for the Fourth of July. Alice is known for throwing great parties, but the Fourth of July is one of my favorites. It's just the family, and we watch the huge fireworks that Emmett and some of the other guys use. They light up the sky, and it looks beautiful.

I smile, as I look out of the car window into the pouring rain. "I'm really excited." The smile fades as I look into the stormy sky, "Will the rain ruin it tomorrow?"

"Nope," She says with a smile, and I can tell that she has already had a vision of the weather. "I wish that I could see how much fun we will have tomorrow, but I still can't get past your barrier."

She has been trying sixteen years to see past the blur that the werewolves and I put on her visions. Only a few times she has been able to do it, but it drains her every time. "That's alright, Alice. I know that we will have fun."

"You're right," She says proudly, and then turns into our long driveway. Our house here in New Hampshire is deep in the forest so people can't find it easily. "So have you talked to Jacob yet today?"

I shake my head, as I think of the last time he called me. "Last night on the phone he told me he would call after he got done with his patrol." I bite my lip, as I think of how much I miss him. "He is having a really good time there. I can tell just by the way he talks. He is happy. He tells me all of the funny things that happened that day, and how much he enjoys seeing everyone there. It's his home."

"You know that he thinks of here as home, too," Alice tells me, as if she is reading my thoughts.

"He belongs there, though." I tell her sadly, "His tribe and his pack are there."

She nods, but then puts one of her cold hands on my shoulder. "Wherever you are he will be happy."

"I know," I say softly, but I don't fully believe it. I know that he is happy when he is with me, but I can tell that there is a pull on him calling here back there. Who would I be to hold him back?

Ten minutes later, and I'm carrying in the last bag full of designer clothing into the house. I place it on the kitchen counter, and then I sit down at the bar. I feel homesick. I don't know how that is possible, since I am at my house, but it's what I am feeling. These past few days I've been shoving my feelings away, though. Like the feelings I had when the electricity bolt went through my body, and all I wanted was Jacob. I can't help but going back to those feelings when I am missing him. I don't really know how to explain those feelings, but I know that they weren't my normal feelings toward him. It wasn't a feeling that I have had towards him before, and they scare me.

The phone ringing pulls me back, and I jump off of the bar stool, and I run quickly to the telephone. "Hello?"

"Hey Nessie," Jacob's excited voice rings through the phone, and it brings a smile to my face. "I miss you so much."

I jump up onto the countertop, and cross my legs at my ankles. "I've missed you like crazy," I admit, "How's everyone?"

"They are doing great," He says, and then I hear yelling coming from the background. "Guys, I am on the phone with Renesmee!" Jacob yells to them, and then he sighs into the phone. "I guess I'm going to have to go to my room to get some peace and quiet."

I can hear a door open and close from his side of the phone, "Jake, you don't need to leave your friends. We can talk later."

"No, I need to talk to you now." He tells me, his voice strong, and it makes me smile even wider. "I've missed you way too much." I feel and uneasiness in my stomach that I've never felt before, and my palms start to become sweaty. Why am I nervous talking to Jake? This never happens. "So what were we saying before we got so rudely interrupted?" He asks, and I hear bed springs squeaking underneath his weight.

I can just imagine him lying in his small bed, in his old bedroom, as he talks to me through the phone. "You were going to tell me about your day."

"Everyone is doing great. You should see Sam and Emily's twins, Daniel and Anna; they have grown up since last year when we saw them. They are turning thirteen in a few days. We are going to have a big bonfire tomorrow night, and we are going to watch the fireworks that will be over La Push beach." He says, and I can hear the happiness in his voice. "What have you been doing today?"

I try to think of a word to describe it. Was I lonely? Yes, but I wouldn't tell him that. "Alice and I just finished an all day shopping trip."

"Sounds like fun," He says sarcastically. I've dragged him to countless shopping trips, and he hates them. I laugh lightly, and he laughs, too. "I've missed you, Ness."

I miss him more than any amount of words could describe. "Me too, I don't know how I am going to last another week."

"I don't think I'm going to be able to," He says, and he lets out a large sigh. "Maybe I should just get a plane coming back tomorrow."

I smile at the thought of him coming back, but there is no way I can let him. "No. As much as I miss you, Jake, you can't leave your family and your home."

"This isn't my only home, Nessie."

I sigh slightly, as I run a hand through my curly bronze hair. "It's where you need to be now, Jake. I can tell, and I know that you know that, too."

"I know but I need to be with you." He admits, and then a few minutes later he says something, "You should come here to La Push."

My heart starts beating faster, as I try to think about me going back there. I loved visiting everyone there, they are like a second family to me, and I would be with my best friend. I know it's only been about a week, but I miss him. "Are you sure you want me there?"

"Of course I want you here," He tells me, as he becomes excited.

I wonder what changed his mind since he left. He had the option to bring me in the beginning, but he didn't. "I would love to come, but I don't know if my family would let me."

"I'm sure Eddie is listening on our conversation, why don't you just ask him?" He says, and I can imagine a smirk pasted on his face.

I look up across the kitchen, and right in the living room are my parents sitting on a couch together. Jake was right. I lock eyes with my dad, and after a few moments, he gives me a nod. I squeal into the phone, "I can go, Jake!"

"Do you think you can be here by tomorrow afternoon? I want you to be at the bonfire," He tells me, "Have your dad get you a plane ticket for an early flight."

I look up over at my parents, and Dad is already getting up from the couch, rolling his eyes. I can't believe it. By tomorrow afternoon I will be with Jake again. "He is about to get a ticket."

"I can't wait to see you," He says excitedly, "Everyone is going to be so happy you are here. I haven't been able to enjoy my time here all the way because you are so far away from me." A large yawn comes from his side of the phone, stopping him from talking.

I yawn after he does, and then we both laugh. "I think I'm going to head to bed. I've got a busy day tomorrow now."

"I'll see you then," He tells me, "I love you, Nessie."

"I love you, Jake." I say with a smile, and then I hang up the phone. Tomorrow I'll be in La Push with my best friend and his family and friends.

I'm going to be on a plane by myself for the first time. I'm going to be leaving my family, and I'm used to seeing them every day, too. For some reason I know that the pain I'll have of missing them won't even compare to missing Jacob. I don't even know if I'll be staying the other week there, or if I'll be coming home after a couple of days. Right now it doesn't even matter, because I'll be with Jacob tomorrow.


	7. Back at La Push

**A/N: Hey! I was originally planning to have this chapter, and the next chapter (going to post soon) as one chapter, but it would have been about 5 thousand words so I decided to split it up. I hope you enjoy it! Thank you so much for favoriting my story, and reviewing it! The reviews mean so much to me! Thank you! (: (Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I do not own the characters, except the ones I make up later.) **

My heart is almost beating out of my chest, as I search around the sea of people looking for Jacob. My throat is on fire from the amount of blood surrounding me, but right now I'm not paying attention to that. I need to see my best friend. People push by me, bumping into my still body, but I don't budge. I told Jacob that I would meet him right under the baggage claim sign, and I am not going to move an inch. As the seconds seem slow down, I begin to get even more anxious to see him.

"Nessie!" A familiar deep voice calls above the noise of the crowd, and I know that it belongs to Jacob. Suddenly, he appears a few feet away from me, and the grin that I loved is spread across his face.

What I see almost makes me faint. This isn't the Jacob that I hugged goodbye last week, was it? It can't be. I never fully noticed his beautiful, dark tanned skin, or the muscles that are pushing through his tight gray t-shirt. I have to put all my focus into pulling my eyes off of him, and I look down to the worn-out, tile floor. My cheeks become warm, and I know that they are turning red. Am I blushing? Because of Jacob? Something is definitely different.

"I've missed you so much," Jake says, as he wraps his large, warm arms around me. I bury my head into his chest, as I forget all my thoughts the moment I am in his embrace. It feels great to be back in his arms.

I wrap my arms around his waist, and I take in his amazing scent. The familiar smell of outside mixed with a scent of –wait is that cologne? Since when does Jake ever wear cologne? It smells really good. I try to shove all of the new changes I've seen of him out of my mind, "I've missed you a lot, too."

"How was your flight?" He asks as he pulls lightly back, just enough to look into my eyes, keeping me in his arms.

Since when did his brown eyes become so detailed? I've never noticed the specks of lighter brown that are gently placed, as they circle his pupils. I find myself getting lost in his eyes, and I feel another blush creep up on my face. Hopefully Jacob won't notice. I can't find the strength to look away from his eyes, and I can feel my heartbeat speeding up.

"Ness, if thinking about the _thirst _is causing your pulse to race, then we can wait to talk about it." He tells me worriedly, not pulling his gorgeous eyes off of my own.

He can feel my heart beating faster. That makes my cheeks become hotter, as I manage to nod. What is going on with me? Since when did I become all jittery around him? I mean, he is my best friend. "Come on," I manage to squeak, and I hope that he doesn't notice that I am nervous. I reach for his hand, and when he claps his hand around mine, a shock sends through my body. The little bolt of electricity goes up my arm, and it fills my chest. Okay, that was _not _normal. I've held Jake's hand numerous times before, and I am positive that that has never happened before. I glance over at Jake, trying to see if he felt what I felt, but he is looking behind him, picking up my suitcase. The only time I have ever felt that electricity bolt was in the kitchen the morning we made pancakes. That lead to the awful silence, and I can't go back to that again. If he isn't feeling what I am feeling, then I can't mention what is going on. I wouldn't know how to explain it, though, since these new feelings are foreign to me.

"Everyone is so excited for you to come," Jake tells me, ten minutes later, as we are driving down the old familiar roads of Washington.

I've been staring out of the windows, trying to distract my attention to outside of the vehicle. His scent has filled up his old truck, and I can feel his heat radiating off of his body. I don't want to look over at him, because I don't want him to think I am staring. I try to put my attention to the trees that would be a big, green blur for any human. "I'm excited to see everyone again," I say enthusiastically. I'm not lying either. I've gotten to know the pack really well these past years, and I've been beginning to miss them since we saw them on New Years.

"You sound a lot happier here," I say quietly after a few minutes of us enjoying the silence, as I think of the way he is acting. He is sitting up straighter, the way he talks sounds warmer, and he seems less tense. I can tell that he has noticed the changes, too, because he smiles.

"They are my family," Jacob says simply, as he slowly pulls up to a red light. He looks over at me, and I try to fight the urge to look at him. It's not as easy as it sounds. Within seconds, I'm looking back into his gorgeous brown eyes. "I'm just glad to be back with them again."

I smile back at him, and then thankfully, the light turns green, and he puts his attention back to the road. I look around at where we are, and I notice that we have entered the land that used to be off limits to my family. A few years after I was born my family and the werewolves (or 'shape-shifters') decided that they would let each other go into each other's areas –as long as they didn't kill humans. It's weird to think that I could have been banned from here, since people that I love live here.

"I'm sure it's going to be hectic when we arrive," Jacob warns, "All the girls are in the house making food for everyone, and the guys are trying to set up everything we need for the bonfire tonight."

When we came down to La Push on New Year's last year I got to become a lot closer with the girls, because we had a lot of time to talk while we cooked food for both of the packs. Last year it was Emily, Claire, Kim, Rachel, Leah and I who were busy with feeding all of the guys. It was a lot of fun, and I fell in love with cooking. I really enjoy doing it, when I know how much everyone will appreciate our work. I smile brightly when I think of seeing them again, "Claire is still dating Quil, right?"

"Uhm, yeah they are still dating. Why?" He says a little timidly, and I can tell that he had to think about his answer before he spoke.

I feel a smile burst across my face, "Good. I just wanted to be sure, because I really like her. It's fun to have someone around my age around." Claire and I are the only girl teenagers who hang out with the pack, and it's nice to have a girl around my age to talk to. I've never really had that. Sure, I've had my family who are technically my age, but I see them as older.

"We are here." He says, and I can already sense a pride in voice. How can he not feel proud when he talks about his home? He is the Alpha of a pack, and everyone here loves him. They look up to him.

I look up, and through the trees I can see the red house that Jacob calls home. From here I can see that they haven't tried to fix up the paint that is chipping off of the sides, and fire logs are still stacked up on the side of the house. I wouldn't expect the house looking great, though, even though I think it looks cute. Billy is almost seventy years old and he is in a wheelchair, so it's not like he can just repaint whenever he wants to. It's tough watching Billy grow older, and I can tell that it has a hug effect on Jake. We don't ever talk about it, but I know it must be hard to watch. That's one of the downsides about living forever. Watching your loved ones grow old, and pass away. Grandpa Charlie is getting older, too, and even though he is with Sue, I know that he misses my mom and our family. It's hard to stay the same while people around you continue to change.

"Nessie?" Jacob asks me, as he opens the door to my side of the truck. I realize that I have been staring off into space, and I didn't even notice we were parked yet. "You okay?"

I smile brightly to him, as he opens the door to the truck more and walks up to me. I turn around on the seat, so my feet are resting on the step to get out of the truck, and Jacob is standing right in front of me. "I'm just really excited."

"I'm so glad that you are here," He tells me, and places his hands on my knees, which sends another electricity bolt through my body.

Is this going to happen every time that he touches me now? I don't know how I'm going to deal with it, and act like nothing is happening. I place my small hands on top of his, "I'm so glad that I am here, too."

"Come on," He says with a smile, as he leans down to kiss me on the forehead. Even this act of love that he has been doing since I was alive, sends the spark through my body. "I'm sure everyone can't wait to see you."

He takes my hand, and then leads me into the forest. We run human speed, so Jake doesn't have to phase, through the trees as we try to make our way to Sam and Emily's house. When we reach the house, I can hear the clinking of the plates and pans in the kitchen where the girls must be.

"I have to warn you by saying that all of the kids are in the house waiting for you." He tells me with a smile, as we walk down the walkway to the front door.

Sam and Emily aren't the only ones who have had kids. In fact, there are a total of eight kids in all. Emily and Sam have Daniel and Anna, Rachel and Paul have Noah and Zach, Leah and Thomas (a new werewolf who joined a few years back) have Rebecca, and Kim and Jared have Alex, Sam, and Abby. The oldest kids are Daniel and Anna who will be thirteen soon, and the youngest one is Abby who is two years old.

"Guess who's here?" Jacob yells as soon as he opens the door to their house, and it causes a bunch of commotion to go through the house. I hear different plates being set down on the counter, and toys being thrown on the floor, as they all run to where we are. I like how Jacob seems almost _proud _to have me with him.

Daniel and Anna run in first, pulling me into a tight hug. It's scary how much they resemble their parents. One thing with all of these kids, you can tell that they are from the tribe with their dark hair and copper skin. Noah and Zach, ages 9 and 7, run in next and then pulls me into a tight hug. Rebecca, 8, pushes through the boys, and gives me a hug. She definitely has girl-power that she inherited from Leah. Once she lets go, Alex and Sam, ages 8 and 7, give me a quick hug. I can hear a young girl laughing before I see Abby wobbling into the living room, wondering what is going on. When she sees me, she studies my face, and then smiles.

I bend down to pick her up, "Hi Abby, remember me?" She smiles and then nods, sending her short dark hair to fall over her eyes. I place her down on the floor, and I watch as Jacob talks to some of the kids. They all are on their tippy-toes trying to give him a high five, but he keeps pulling his hand up higher and higher. I remember him doing that with me when I was younger, and he looked so tall from where I was. Then again, he is still extremely tall, seven feet, now. I can tell how much they admire him, and I can tell by his face how much he enjoys them.

"Renesmee!" Emily says loudly, as she holds her arms out for a hug. "You look so beautiful, as always."

I pull her into a tight hug, and I smile brightly at her. "Why thank you, you look gorgeous." The scar on her face has always been interesting to me, and when I learned how it happened a few years ago I became even more interested in it. I know that Sam is reminded of the awful moment when he lost his anger every time he looks at her, and I can't imagine how tough it is for him.

"Ness, I've missed you!" Claire yells excitedly, and pulls me into a hug. "We have so much to talk about!" Her long, dark hair falls halfway down her stomach, and her bangs are pulled back by a headband.

Maybe I can tell her about my feelings toward Jacob, but what if she doesn't understand? He is supposed to be my best friend only. Right? Then what can explain all of the electricity shocks? I try to push those thoughts aside as I look at one of my other best friends, "I know we do! I've missed you!"

"I'm glad my brother got into his senses, and invited you here." Rachel tells me, as she pulls me into a hug. "It's always a lot of fun with you here. Plus, it's more hands in the kitchen."

I laugh, and hug Jacob's sister tightly. Over the years she and Emily have been like my mom's away from home. Not like they can replace my own mother, but they are always here to give me advice. "I'm ready to help."

"Great, then maybe I can babysit the kids instead of cooking," Leah adds sarcastically, as she makes her way for me. I know that Leah wasn't very fond of me when I was born, and she isn't completely 'best friends' with me yet, but I'm just glad that she is trying. "Good to see you, Nessie."

Kim, who met Jared at high school, pushes her way through the girls to get to me. "I'm so glad you are here, Renesmee." She hugs me tightly, "We really have to get back to cooking if we want the dinner to be ready in three hours."

"I'm going to go help the guys get everything ready," Jacob says, as he walks over to me. "You are okay with cooking with the girls, right?" I nod, and he smiles. "Alright, well I will be over at the beach if you need me." He kisses me on the top of the head, and then leaves the room, looking over his shoulder one last time before he leaves.

"The food isn't going to cook itself! Let's go girls," Emily says, as she leads us into the kitchen, and tosses me an apron. "Bonfire is in three hours."

I tie the apron around my neck, as I try to understand of the feeling I just felt when Jake kissed me on the forehead again.


	8. Fireworks

**A/N: Thank you everyone for reading this so far! Thank you so much for the reviews, the favoriting, the story alerts, and favorite author! It all means soooo much to me! I hope that you guys enjoy this chapter! I know that I might not be able to live up to everyones liking, but I liked what i ended up writing. (: please review! Thank you! (Disclaimer: i am not stephenie meyer, and i do not own the characters)**

The sound of the fire crackling and the warmth it brings makes my eyelids feel heavy. Without thinking, I lay my head of Jacob's shoulder, which sends another shock through me. Great, now I can't even lay my head down without getting that weird feeling. Jake moves his hand from at his side, to around my waist. He squeezes my side, and it sends another shock through me. This time, my stomach becomes uneasy, and it's the way I felt when I was on the phone with Jake. I'm not nervous though, but I don't know how to describe it. It's like my stomach is flipping inside out.

"You can't be tired yet, the fireworks haven't even started," Jake teases, through a mouthful of food. I think that he is on his seventh hamburger, and I got full after one. He scoots closer to me on the log that we are sitting on, so he can wrap me in his arms more.

My stomach does more flips, as I feel electricity bolts go throughout my body. I'm trying to focus on the fact that I shouldn't be worrying about what I am feeling, and I should be enjoying the fact that I am with Jacob. That thought makes me smile, "I know. Don't worry; I'll be awake for them."

"You better be," He whispers playfully, and then he lets go of me, so he can go throw away his plate. "I'll be right back."

I watch as he walks away, and then I find myself looking around the fire. The children are already sleeping inside in Sam and Emily's house, and many different baby monitors are placed on each of the logs. Claire and Quil are sitting next to me, completely unaware of everyone else around them, and when I look around that is how most of the couples are. Embry, Seth, Colin, and Brady, are all joking loudly with each other to the right of me.

"Hey Nessie," Seth says as he gets up from his log, and sits where Jake has been. "How are you enjoying the bonfire so far?"

I smile, as I look over at Seth. Seth has been around since I was born, and he has become one of my best, goofiest, friend. "I'm having a lot of fun. Are the fireworks good here?"

"I don't know if they are Cullen good, but they are pretty awesome." He says smiling a wide smile, as he looks in the direction of the beach. "We should probably go down there soon so we can see them."

Suddenly, Seth is falling backwards off of the log, and into grass. At first I don't understand why he fell, but Jacob's big laugh lets me know that he pushed him off. Seth quickly jumps up, and chases Jacob around our log, and then into the grass area behind us. Sometimes boys will be boys, I guess. Jacob pulls Seth's head underneath his arm, and then rubs his hair to make it messy. I can tell how much Jacob loves everyone here, and how much fun he has with everyone.

"Boys, the fireworks are going to start soon." Sam warns them, not looking away from Emily. Sam has aged through the years, because he doesn't phase like he used to. With my family gone there is not a reason to be a wolf all the time, so he gets away with only doing it sometimes. Jared and Paul have aged a little, too, but not too much. The other members of the pack phase normally, since they need to patrol the areas to make sure no vampires enter their property.

Jacob lets go of Seth, and then Seth gives him a push on the shoulders. They start laughing as they walk back over to where I am sitting. Jacob lends a hand out to me, "Sorry, Ness, I had to get revenge. Yesterday he pushed me out of a tree."

"It seemed like fun," I tell him with a smile, as I grab his hand. The electricity bolt that I knew would come, goes through my arm and fills my chest once again. Before he pulls me up, I get caught in the way he looks. The moonlight is reflecting off of his face, and the fire is shinning off of his body. He looks….handsome.

Jacob gently pulls me up to my feet, and then he holds an arm out, motioning the beach. "You ready?"

"Of course," I tell him, and then I notice everyone making their way towards the beach. When we reach the sand I take off my white flip-flops, and I carry them in my hand that isn't holding Jacob's. The sand feels cool underneath my feet, as we make our way to the water. The sound of the waves crashing gently against the shore becomes louder as we get closer. The large moon in the sky is reflecting against the water, and I can't wait to see how the fireworks look when they appear in the sky.

"Let's go over there," Jacob says, as he points to the left where large rocks are. Everyone else goes straight ahead, and sits together in a big clump near the water. Jacob leads me by them, and we walk a few feet to the rocks. "Is here okay? I just thought that we could use the rock as a backrest."

I smile as I sit down in the sand, and lean against the cold rock. I stretch out my legs, and the waves wash up to my ankles, and then go back into the ocean. The cold water keeps flowing up to my legs, as Jacob sits down next to me, and leans back on the same rock. "It's so gorgeous here," I tell him, as I stare into the star covered sky. It's weird thinking that last night I was laying in New Hampshire, staring up at the stars, wishing that I could be with him.

"I know," He says as he stares out into the ocean. A few minutes pass of us admiring the view, and then he slides his arm around my waist, and he brings me closer to him. The electricity bolts go throughout my body, as I lean against his body. He looks down to look at me, and I look up into his beautiful eyes again. "You look beautiful, Nessie."

A blush explodes on my face, and I feel my stomach flip again. He has called me beautiful before, but I can't help but think he means it differently now. His eyes had a certain sparkle when he said it. But that can't be. I'm probably just imagining everything. "Thank you," I tell him softly.

"Anytime," He says with a smile, and then kisses me on the forehead, sending the spark again.

I lean my head against his chest, and I place my hand where his heart is. Underneath my hand, I can feel Jacob's heartbeat speeding up. Am I just imagining this, too? I sigh deeply, as I close my eyes. What has been going on with me lately? I get all jittery whenever he is around, and I'm looking at my _best friend _differently.

Suddenly, his hand that is at my waist, starts tickling my side. I jump and gasp, as I try to escape his grip. With the other hand, he attacks my stomach, which sends my body into rapid movements.

"Ja-aCOB!" I yell loudly, as bursts of laughter explode from my mouth. "Not funny!"

He laughs with me, as he continues to tickle me faster. Within seconds, I am sitting on his lap, and his arms are wrapped around me. I try to squirm out, but his strong arms don't let me go, "I don't think you can escape."

"I can try," I tell him as I place my hands on his chest, and push the top half of my body away from him. His arms are holding me at the waist, and I know that I can't break his hold. Not that I would really want to. I sigh as I give up, and drop my hands down into my lap. Jacob is looking at me, his beautiful eyes searching my own. A smile tugs at his lips as he looks at me. "What?" I ask him curiously.

He just continues to stare at me, and I can feel another blush evade my cheeks. The electricity bolts are buzzing through my body, as I find myself questioning my feelings again. What have I been feeling towards Jacob these past few days? Why do I become nervous when he is around, and why have I been seeing him differently? When I look back into his deep brown eyes, I gasp, knowing that I can see the answer in him. Realization hits me like a wave, flooding over every emotion. It's why my stomach has been acting up, it's why every time I see him I am at a loss for words, and it's why every touch sends a spark. I love my best friend, Jacob Black. Not like a brother, protector, or a best friend. It's much more than that… I am _in love _with him.

"Renesmee," Jacob whispers quietly, as he uses one of his hands to tuck back my bronze curls behind my ear. His voice sends a different spark, and my breath becomes stuck in my throat. His other arm that is wrapped around my waist brings me closer to him, our chests pushed together, as he continues to stare into my eyes. In his face I can tell that he isn't positive about what he is about to do.

"Jake, I –" I start to say, but then something stops me.

Jacob's lips press against mine lightly, and a huge electricity bolt goes through my lips and to my chest. The bolt seems to hit my heart, and a completely new feeling enters my body. I wrap my arms around his neck, and he puts on of his hands into my hair. His lips press harder against mine as I kiss back. Everything I can see is Jacob, it's like the whole world just melted away. I could feel him smiling underneath my lips, and I knew that I was smiling, too. How could I not? I feel complete, and I know that he has been feeling the same things that I have been feeling.

BOOM!

Jake and I break from our kiss, and look up into the sky. Fireworks are exploding in the sky right above our heads, and they are being reflected against the water. The multicolored fireworks add sparkle to the sky, and I smile brightly. As cheesy as it might sound, I felt like I had fireworks going on in my head when I kissed Jacob.

Jacob. My Jacob.

"Wow," Jake whispers, as we stop looking up at the sky, and look into each other's eyes. The fireworks are reflecting in his eyes, as he smiles brightly at me. "I love you Renesmee Carlie Cullen."

He just said he loves me! Not like a younger sister or a best friend, but something so much better. I can feel my heart swell, as my cheeks become red again. This time I'm not embarrassed if he can feel my heart beating faster, because his is, too. Instead of telling him that I love him I place my hand on his cheek, and show him how I've been reacting to every touch and every time he walks into my view. At the end I show him this message: "I love you Jacob Black."

"Renesmee, I have so much to tell you." Jacob tells me, as he kisses me lightly on the lips, and I almost faint. "Have you ever heard of imprinting?"


	9. Imprinting

**A/N: Hey guys I'm finally back! I'm so sorry that it was such a long break, but I hope that I can post a new chapter tomorrow! I hope that you enjoy this chapter, and thank you for everyone is sticking with this story! Please review! (: (disclaimer: I am not stephenie meyer, and I don't own the characters)  
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"Imprinting?" I manage to whisper softly, as I try to catch my breath. Why in the world would he bring whatever that is now? I mean, we just kissed! My head is still spinning, and I can hear our hearts beating rapidly. I didn't realize how much that I have wanted to kiss him until a few minutes ago and now he is trying to quiz me on vocabulary?

A small chuckle comes from his mouth, and he grabs my hand that is resting on his cheek. I can feel a blush erupt on my face, as I realize I let him listen to all of my thoughts. A smile tugs at his lips as he removes my hand from his face, "Don't worry, I've wanted to kiss you for a while now, too. I've mentioned imprinting because it is a reason why we are feeling these things."

"Don't you mean hormones?" I blurt out, and immediately I want to take back the words I just said. My parents have mentioned hormones before, but I've never heard of imprinting. I try to remember the awkward conversation that I had with my parents, but I can't remember the word imprinting.

He laughs lightly, and keeps his eyes focused on mine. Right now he looks happier than I have ever seen him, and it brings a smile to my face. "Hormones are a part of it, I guess. But imprinting is the major thing. Do you have any idea of what imprinting is?" I just shake my head, and let him continue. "Well, it happens with us wolves. A way some describe it is like love at first sight, but it's much, _much _stronger than that. It's like when you first see them, gravity isn't holding you to the earth anymore. They are. You would do anything for that person."

"How does that have to deal with us, Jake? I've known you for my whole life, and just recently I've been feeling this way." I explain to him, as the rest of the pack 'oohs' and 'ahhs' at the fireworks that are exploding over our heads. It's hard to talk over the sound of them, but Jacob looks like he needs to tell me now.

"Well, the relationship first starts out like a brother and sister bond, then a protector, and then it is a best friend feeling. Later down the line if the imprinted person wants it to become a romantic relationship then it evolves into that. It's all up to the imprinted, and the person who imprinted on them is happy with whatever." He explains to me slowly.

Is that why Emily and Sam, Claire and Quil, and all of the other couples in the pack always looks so happy when they are with each other? That explains why whenever they are together it seems like nothing else matters. "So you imprinted on me?"

"Yes," He says, and I can see uncertainty in his eyes as he searches my own. When I don't reply to him after a few seconds, he lets go of my hands and scrunches his eyebrows. "That doesn't mean you have to love me, Renesmee. I don't want you to feel that you have to feel that way. I shouldn't have kissed you without talking to you about what you wanted first. All I want is for you to be happy, but I just –."

Feeling my own courage bubbling up inside me, I lean forward and press my lips softly on his. It isn't rushed, instead it is comforting. Almost as quick as the kiss started, it ends and I look at him directly in his eyes. "Jacob, calm down. I am in love with you, and nothing you do can ever change that. I am just so relieved that this won't hurt our friendship because of this bond that we have. I'm glad that this answers the reasons why I've been so confused with my feelings for you. Don't regret kissing me, because I don't regret kissing you."

"I love you," He tells me, as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his embrace. I rest my head on his warm chest, as I look up into the sky. The fireworks are still bursting in the sky, and I can feel the rumble when they explode. Jacob's lips press softly against the top of my head, as I wrap my arms around his waist.

I try to focus on how beautiful the sky is, but how can I when everything just happened? Every time new fireworks explode in the sky, Jacob's arms wrap tighter around me. He imprinted on me. I know that we are going to talk about it more in the future, but I can't help my thinking about it. Ever since I was born he knew that we were going to be sharing a bond that is hard to describe. He said that I am the thing that holds him to earth, and it makes me relieved. He cares about me as much as I care about him. We both love each other. Suddenly, a thought enters my mind, and when it does it makes me tense up.

Would he still love me even if he never imprinted on me? Would I still love him? Is the only reason that I feel feelings for him, is because I have to? This imprinting bond seems strong, so did it give me all of these emotions? The only reason he stayed with my family and I is because he imprinted on me. Did he even want to stay with us? He could be happy here with his family and friends, but because of this bond he is stuck with me.

"Renesmee, what's wrong?" Jacob's strong, deep voice pulls me into reality. I can tell that he felt me tense up underneath his arms, and I know that I won't be able to hide the fact that I'm stressing from him.

I look away from him and to the ocean that is glistening from the moon and the fireworks. The waves crash against the sand, and the warm water washes up against my legs. Maybe I am just over reacting. Maybe it's just all of the feelings, fireworks, and everything combined. As I try to convince myself I'm just making it up, the thought still nags me at the back of my head. Knowing that I will have to ask him this sooner or later, I take a deep breath and then ask, "Would you still love me if you never imprinted on me?"

Silence. I'm not expecting an answer right away, since the question was so out of the blue for him. Heck, I don't even know how to answer the question and I've been thinking about it. Jacob's arms pull me in closer to him, as he thinks about the question that I have just asked. I let my eyelids close, as Jacob's warmth brings me comfort. It's been a long and confusing day, and I don't know if I'm emotionally ready for his answer. What could be the worse response I could get from him? If he told me that he would still love me then would we accept the answer? If he told me no then what would we do then? It's not like we can change the fact he imprinted on me. The only answer that I think would be right for the question is an 'I don't know', because honestly we don't know and we never will know. All we know is we both love each other, even if it is only because of the imprinting.

"I don't know," Jacob finally says his voice tight and soft. "I would like to think I would still love you, and that imprinting only adds more emotions. The truth is that I can't give you an answer for that, Renesmee. It's as if I asked you if you would still love me. There is no way that you could possibly know. I do know a few things, though. I know that you are the most incredible person that I have ever met. I know that your happiness and joy brings my own, and I can't bear to see you sad or upset. You love everyone around you, even when it is difficult, and I admire you for that. You stick up for your family and friends, and you can sometimes be very stubborn when things don't go the way you had hoped. I am so proud of the woman that you have grown to be, and I can't imagine falling in love with anyone else but you."

I don't realize that I am crying until Jacob uses his thumb to wipe away my tears that are streaking down my face. I don't know how I could have ever doubted that Jacob loved me. "You don't know how much that means to me," I say through my tears, as I bury my face into his chest. "I love you so much. I don't care if we never know if we would have been together if you didn't imprint on me, because you _did. _We can't keep saying what-if and getting ourselves worked up. I'm so happy that you imprinted on me because that means I am never going to lose you. I can't lose you, Jacob."

"You are _never _going to lose me," Jacob says, more power behind his voice than a few minutes ago. "I love you."

"I love you, Jacob. I love every little thing about you. I love how you become happier when you are with your family and friends, I love how you are always here for me, and I love all of your little quirks. You have stuck with me since I can remember, and I love you for that." I say softly, as my tears lightly fall onto his chest, causing his gray shirt to become wet. He rocks me back in forth in his strong arms, until I stop crying.

Jacob stops rocking me, and then with a hand he grabs my chin and pulls my face up to meet his. He leans in close to me, only about an inch away from my face, and he smiles, "I love you." He closes the distance, as he places his lips onto mine. I let go of his waist, and then I place my hands on his neck as he places his hands on my sides. His touch still gives me sparks. He lifts me up so I am sitting on his lap, and then he deepens the kiss. My fingers play with the ends of his hair that stop halfway down his neck, and he pulls me closer to him. It's pure bliss kissing him. It's like something that I have never felt before, and it makes me happy. _He _makes me happy.

"Happy fourth of July," He whispers as our kiss ends a few minutes later, his breath tickles my face. His forehead is pressed against mine, and he is smiling widely. His lips are slightly red, and I can only imagine mine are, too. Up above us the sky is calm, and the fireworks have stopped. I glance over to the spot of the beach where the rest of the pack were, and it's empty. I blush immediately as I realize that they must have seen us kissing. "Don't worry; they are used to this sort of thing," Jacob tells me reassuringly.

I know that I didn't let him in on my thoughts this time, and that he must have figured it out on his own. We can read each other so easily just by body language and what we say, and we have a bond that is too strong for anyone to break. He will always be there for me, and the thought brings a smile to my face. "I love you, Jacob."


	10. Happier Than Before

**A/N: (Disclaimer: i am not stephenie meyer, and i dont own these characters) Thank you so much for all of the reviews! I am sooooo thankful for each and everyone of them! It helps me become motivated to write more, and I can't thank you enough! I hope that you enjoy this chapter, and I might be able to upload another one in the next maybe 12 hours! (: haha. Thank you again so much for sticking with me thus far! Please keep reading and reviewing! (: THANK YOU & enjoy! **

The clinking of pans falling to the hard tile floor causes my eyes to open quickly. I hear a deep voice mumbling in the kitchen, as the pans are being picked up. Laughing quietly, I listen as they fumble with the pots and pans. Slowly, I glance over to the window, where the curtain is letting rays of sunshine glimmer on my face, and then I pull a pillow of my face. I take a long, deep breath as the pillow lies on my face, and a familiar scent enters my senses. The smell of the ocean and pine trees makes me smile underneath the pillow, as I notice the scent right away. It's Jacob's scent. Why wouldn't it be? This is his pillow that he let me use. Jacob offered to sleep on the couch, and even though I said that I could, I knew he wouldn't let me. So I slept on his large bed, as he hung halfway off of the tiny couch in the living room.

"Dang it!" Jacob's deep voice comes from the kitchen, as I hear silverware clinking on the counter. He has never been very graceful.

I find myself giggling as I remember all of the times that Jake has fallen or ran into something. There are too many times to count! He even stumbled in the sand last night when were heading back to his house after the firework show. Suddenly, I feel butterflies in my stomach and my face becomes red. Jacob and I kissed last night, and we told each other we were in love with each other. I can still remember the emotions I felt last night when we kissed, and it brings a large smile to my face.

"Sounds like someone is already up," Jacob says softly, as he opens the door to his room, and peeks his head in. "What are you laughing about?"

I pull the pillow off of my face, and turn to smile at him. Just the look of him sends that familiar shock through me, and I realize that I could get used to that feeling. "You," I tell him still smiling.

"Me?" He looks confused, as he swings the door open wider and steps in. My breath becomes stuck in my throat as I see that he isn't wearing a shirt. Sure, most of the time he doesn't wear a shirt, but he hasn't since I've arrived. I've never noticed how toned and ripped he is. "Why are you laughing about me?"

I cough and rip my eyes off of his stomach, and I place them back in his deep, brown eyes. "I was just thinking how much a klutz you are, since your recent dropping of the pans reminded me."

"Did that wake you up?" He asks me, almost afraid that he did. "I'm sorry! I'm making our breakfast: chocolate chip pancakes. It will be ready in ten minutes if you want some."

I nod excitedly, as I realize how hungry I am. I sit up so I am leaning on the headboard of his bed, "I'll get ready, and then I'll come eat."

"Alright," He tells me with a smile, and then starts to leave the room. Right before he closes the door, the looks over his shoulder, "Good morning, beautiful."

A blush covers my face again, and I find myself smiling even brighter. Almost everything he says or does now brings a blush to my face. Even though he is probably already in the kitchen, I can't help but whisper, "Good morning."

Ten minutes later I am pulling on my outfit, white denim shorts and a pink v-neck shirt, and looking at myself in the mirror. My brown hair is still slightly wet from the quick shower I took, and loose ringlets go a few inches past my shoulders. My tired, brown eyes look right back at me, and there is a certain sparkle that hasn't been there before.

"Breakfast is ready!" Jacob's voice calls from the kitchen, and I race towards the sound. I see him flipping pancakes, and I realize that he has gotten a lot better at it since I taught him a few days ago. It's crazy how far back that day seems now. That day when we made pancakes changed everything, and I used to wish that that moment never happened –but now I'm glad it did.

I wrap my tiny arms around his warm, toned stomach and I lay the side of my head on his back. "Good morning," I say quietly, as he jumps to my touch.

"Morning to you, too," He tells me, and then quickly turns around so he is facing me. My arms are still wrapped around his body, as he stares into my eyes. He grabs my hips, and lifts me up, taking me backwards. He sits me down on the counter behind me, and then we are eye level with each other. "How are you this morning?"

I move my hands up to around his neck, and he wraps his around my waist. My knees are on the sides of his hips, and he is leaning against the counter. "I am pretty good, you?" I ask breathlessly, as I try to peel my eyes off of his lips.

"Great now that you are here," He says with a smile, and then tucks back my wet hair behind my ear. He leans in slowly, and places his lips on mine. My heartbeat starts quickening, as I wrap my legs around his waist and cross my legs at my ankles. He pulls me closer to him, as we deepen the kiss.

My stomach growls lightly, and I feel him smile underneath my lips. I groan as I put my hands on my stomach, "Sorry. I'm hungry."

"That's alright, we should eat." He grabs my waist, again sending the electricity currents, and then places me back on the floor. A few minutes later, Jacob has already ate seven pancakes, and I've ate two. "So some of the pack members are hanging out at Sam and Emily's house, did you want to go after breakfast?"

I smile at the fact of us hanging out with his family and our friends more. "Sure, is your dad down there already?"

"Yeah, Sam came to pick him up right before you woke up. They wanted to discuss something about the tribe." He mumbles through a mouthful of food, and then he chugs down a whole glass of milk.

I use my fork to push little pieces of pancake around on the plate, as I let my thoughts wander. It's going to be hard to see Jacob saying goodbye to all of these people, and I know that it will be hard for me saying goodbye. I don't even know if I am going to stay as long as Jacob is. He only has six days left here, am I supposed to stay the whole time? "Jacob, when am I leaving to go home?"

"I was thinking that you could go home with me on the eleventh like I had planned for me." He tells me, and then he looks up from his food. "Why did you want to go home early?"

"No!" I blurt out, not wanting him to think that I don't like it here. Because that is not true at all. In fact, I absolutely love it here. Something about the atmosphere here this visit is inviting, and I feel like I should be here. "I was just wondering."

He eyes me suspiciously, raising a brown eyebrow, but then he shrugs it off. "I'm done if you want to leave for Sam's house now." I nod excitedly, and then I help him clean up the table. As we walk out of the backdoor, he grabs a hold of my arm, and brings me close to him. He places a kiss on my lips, and then pulls away after a minute. "Sorry, I just don't know if I'll be able to do that again today."

"No need to apologize," I tell him with a smile, and I wonder if he can tell that even by a simple kiss I'm about to faint. I lean up on my tiptoes and kiss him on the cheek, "Come on, I know you want to go." I take his hand, and then we go running into the woods.

"I saw you two all over each other last night," Seth whispers to Jacob and I across the table, and then he winks playfully.

I groan and put my face in my hands, trying to hide my red face from the whole room. I know that even though Seth whispered it lightly, the whole pack can hear it. We've avoided this conversation this whole day, and now right before dinner, Seth has to bring it up. Jacob places his hand on my knee underneath my table, as a sign of comfort. I release one of my hands from my face, and I grab his hand tightly.

"Ouch!" Seth yells suddenly, as he bends over to grab his shin. "I was just teasing you guys!"

Jacob doesn't find it funny, though, and I'm guessing it's because he sees how embarrassed I am of it. That must be why he kicked Seth underneath the table. I guess I should be used to people teasing each other about their romance –I mean, I live with Emmett. It's just different when it's about _me, _and not someone else.

"Oh come on, Seth." Leah complains from the other end of the dinner table, as she leans against Thomas who is sitting next to her. "Grow up, will you?"

Tonight, it's Sam, Emily, me, Jacob, Leah, Thomas, Billy, Seth, Claire, and Quil eating tonight. Seth is the only one here who has never been in love before, so he is the only one who finds his jokes funny. If Collin and Brady, the other two who haven't imprinted yet, were here they might laugh. Now everyone just rolls their eyes, but I can't help but feel embarrassed.

"It's alright; Quil and I got teased in the beginning, too." Claire comforts me, as she places her hand on my shoulder. "I'm just glad that you know everything now."

I smile at her, "I'm glad, too."

"It's a whole lot easier on Jacob, too," Billy adds from the other side of Jacob. "He is already a lot happier, I can tell."

I squeeze Jacob's hand tightly, "I'm happier, too, Billy." Just seeing Jacob can light up my day, and know that I know he is mine it makes me even more excited to be with him.

"Dinner's served," Sam and Emily call out as the place the plates filled with fried chicken, potatoes, and veggies on the table.

Emily, Claire and I keep still, since we know what is going to happen. Right as the plates reach the table, everyone around us goes crazy over the food, like they haven't ate in days. Everyone has huge smiles on their faces as they gather up food. Claire and I look at each other and laugh and Quil and Jacob fight over a chicken leg. I could get used to this: all of the noise, being surrounded by our friends, and watching Jacob being happier than I've ever seen him. My heart swells with happiness as I realize that I can also call here one of my homes.


	11. Billy

**A/N: Hey guys! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I hope that you guys like this chapter, and I am already working on the next one. Please review and tell me what you think! Thank you & enjoy!**

"Renesmee, can I talk to you for a minute?"

I look over my shoulder, and Billy is rolling his wheelchair over to me. I give him a smile, "Sure!" I turn back around to Claire, who was telling me about a date she had with Quil a week ago, and I look at her, "Do you mind?"

"Not at all!" She tells me with a smile, and she gets off of the couch that we are sitting on, and then she makes her way into the kitchen where Emily is cooking.

I watch as Billy slowly pushes the wheels to bring him in front of the couch, and he stops when he is right across from me. His dark brown eyes, which look almost identical to Jacob's, look tired and wary. His whole face is covered with wrinkles, and he looks like tiredness has swept through his whole body. Suddenly a smile explodes on his face, and he holds out a hand for me to grab. When I take it, his smile becomes wider, "I just want to thank you."

"For what?" I ask him, as I grab his old, wrinkly hand tighter. I've gotten to know Billy these past few years, and he is like a second father to me. When I was younger I used to sit in his lap, and he would wheel us around. Now we are both older, and he is too weak to push us both.

"For making Jacob happy again," He says simply, as he locks his eyes with my own. "Ever since you were born he has became a new, better person, and now that you two are together I can tell that he is a lot happier."

I love seeing Billy talk about Jacob, because in his eyes I can tell that he is so proud of him. I know that I didn't just make him happier, but that he changed my life as well. "I love him, Billy, and he has made me happier, too."

"I can tell," He says, speaking with a hint of glimmer in his eyes. "You are going to make an amazing wife and mother one day."

Wife and mother? Jacob and I had our first kiss a couple of days ago, and now I'm already being thought of his wife and a mother to his kids? My heart starts picking up speed as I realize that I can't wait to be Jacob's wife. I know that in the future I will marry him, and the thought makes me smile. I've never thought about being a mother, but I can imagine little Jacob's running around the house as we try to catch them. I know that I don't have to worry about the future right now, so I just smile at Billy, "Thank you."

"I can't imagine a better wife for my son, and I am so glad that it is you, Renesmee." He tells me, and I can start to see tears forming in his eyes, as they start to glisten. "I know that you don't need my permission for this, but I just want to tell you. I give you permission to marry my son. I know that it probably won't be soon, and it might be a few years down the road, but I just wanted to tell you."

I know that tears are forming in my own eyes, as I smile brightly at him. "That means a lot Billy, and I'm glad that you wanted to come and talk to me."

"I figured that since all of the boys were patrolling and running all over the place that it would be a good time for us to talk," He says, and then he lets go of my hand. "I love you, Renesmee."

"Love you, too." I smile, and then lean forward to give him a kiss on the cheek. "I'm glad that we got to talk."

He smiles, and then wheels backwards a little, "Me too, kiddo."

"You did not beat me!" Quill's voice echo's through the entire house, as the front door swings open and they come in.

Jacob scoffs at what he says, and then punches him in the arm, "Yeah right. I won the race."

"I don't know, Jacob." Claire adds as she walks out of the kitchen, and wraps an arm around Quill's waist. "Quil is pretty fast."

"Then obviously you haven't seen Jacob run," I tell her as I walk over to Jacob, and wink at the three of them. Jacob wraps his arm around my shoulder, and I grab his hand with mine. "So how was patrol?"

"Boring," Quill answers me, as he brings Claire in closer to him. "There are no vampires around anymore, so I'd rather be here spending time with Claire."

I watch as Claire blushes, and reaches up to give him a kiss on the cheek. She grabs his hand, and leads him into the kitchen. Jacob pulls me into a tight hug, and kisses me on the top of my head. "What were you talking to my dad about?" He whispers in my ear, giving me goose bumps.

"We were just talking." I tell him, as I rest my head on his chest. I can hear his heart beating underneath my ear, and my eyes close. "So what did you want to do today?"

"Well, I was hoping –" Jacob's train of thought is interrupted by a loud scream that echoes through the house.

"SOMEONE CALL THE HOSPITAL!" Sam's strong voice makes everything quiet. What happened? I can feel my heart beating faster as Jacob grabs my hand, and pulls me to the front of the house. As we walk out of front door, something makes Jacob freeze where he is.

Billy's head is hanging down, his chin touching his chest, and his body looks limp. I manage to tear my eyes off of him, and I look up to Jacob. His eyes look hallow, and his face has no emotion. He is just frozen.

"He passed out, and his heartbeat is slowing. We need to get him to the hospital!" Sam yells over to us, as he puts too fingers on his neck to find a pulse. "I don't know what happened!"

Emily runs out of the front door, and rushes to where Sam and Billy are. She removes the phone from her ear, "The hospital has a room for him. We just have to get them there. It is only a few minutes away."

"Jacob, help me get Billy in my truck." Sam yells over to where we are standing.

I look up to Jacob, but his eyes are fixed on Billy. His hand is gripping my hand so tightly that it hurts, but I don't say anything. Sam yells over to Jacob again, trying to get his attention, but he doesn't budge. I know that we have to get Billy to the hospital, so I reach up to Jacob's face with my free hand. I pull his face down, so his eyes will meet mine. Once his eyes look like awake again, I squeeze his hand. "Jacob, he needs your help."

"Ness," He whispers softly, not letting his eyes leave mine. Tears are forming in his eyes, and I can feel my heart aching. He hasn't come this close to crying before in front of me.

"I'm here, Jake," I tell him as I pull his face closer to mine. No matter how much I want to kiss him and to tell him that it is okay, I know I can't. It's not the time for that. He needs me to be strong. "You need to go help Billy."

His eyes and face look full of pain, as he leans down to kiss me on the forehead. "Thanks." He looks down at our hands, like he is afraid that I am going to leave, and then he slowly lets go. I watch as he basically drags his feet over to Billy, and picks him up from the wheelchair. Sam has the back door to the truck open, and Jacob slides Billy in.

"Renesmee, do you want to go to the hospital with us?" Emily asks me, as she places a hand on my back.

I manage a nod, and then she brings me over to the truck. Jacob is sliding into the seat next to Billy, and then I move into the seat next to Jacob. Jacob's hands automatically find my own, and I lean into him. As I close my eyes, and find comfort in Jacob, I hear Emily telling Quill and Claire to go and tell everyone to meet us at the hospital.

Everything has changed in the past few minutes. It was only a moment ago when I was smiling as I talked to Billy, and now he lays unconscious in the seat. I can't imagine what happened, since he seemed fine a few minutes ago. Sam said that he fainted, but from what? I know that he is getting old, but I don't want him to leave us yet. I don't think I'd be able to handle it. My heart breaks at the thought of watching Jacob deal with the loss of his father. I try to push the image out of my mind, because it hasn't happened yet. Billy is still here, and that is all that matters. I bring myself closer to Jacob, as I struggle to hold in the tears that are building up. He wraps one arm around me, and holds me close to him.

Emily sits in the passenger seat, as Sam starts the car. I hear them talking to each other, but I don't try to focus on the words. I'm only worried about two things at the moment: Jacob and Billy. I can't find enough strength to open my eyes and look over at them, but I know what I'd see anyways. Both of them hurting, and both of them in need of help and comfort.


	12. Tears, Comfort, and Pain

**A/N: (disclaimer: i am not stephenie meyer, and i do not own these characters.) Hey! This chapter was hard for me to write because i wasn't sure which direction i wanted to take it. I'm happy with the way it went though, and I hope that you guys like it! Thank you so much for all of the reviews! Please review this chapter! (: thank you & enjoy! **

I've never been to a hospital before, and now I'm sure that I never want to be here again. Everything is white here, and it feels like something has gone in and drained out every happy emotion. At least that's what it feels like in the empty ER waiting room. I don't know how long we have been here, but I've been able to count all of the tiles on the floor about a hundred times. There are one thousand three hundred and eighty two. I don't know what else to do but count the tiles and wait. When we first got here, there were doctors waiting to bring Billy into a back room. We haven't seen a single doctor since. There are no windows in this room, so I can't tell if the sun is still out. It was morning when we drove here, but now I'm not sure what time it is. Jacob hasn't said a word to anyone yet, but he is holding me tightly in his arms. I'm sitting on his lap, as he big arms wrap around my stomach. His head is lying heavily on my shoulder, but I don't mind. If this is the way he needs to be comforted, then I'm going to let him do it.

"Sam, we've been here for six hours." Emily's tired voice comes from a few chairs down, and I try to act like I'm not listening.

Sam sighs, as he runs his hands through his hair. "I don't know what to do, Em. I don't know what happened. One minute we were laughing about how much food we have to cook to feed us all, and then next –." Sam's voice drifts off, as Emily wraps her arms around him.

Around the room members of the pack and people from the tribe who know Billy are sitting helplessly on the chairs. No one is asleep, but we all aren't really here. It's like we've been disconnected, and we are just frozen in this time. I want to be able to comfort Jacob, but I know that all he needs from me is to be here. I know that I am not going to leave him. Not now, and not ever. Whenever he needs me I'm going to be here to give him what he needs.

Jacob's lips press against my neck, and a sudden bolt of electricity goes through my body. He keeps repeating the soft kiss in same spot, and each time I feel the current shoot through me. He is doing this for comfort. "Please don't ever leave me," His breath tickles my neck as he talks, but I can hardly feel it. All I am focusing on is the hurt in his voice.

"Never," I tell him as I lift a hand up, and place it on his head. I run my hand through his thick, dark hair, as he continues to kiss my shoulder and my neck. His kisses aren't full of eagerness; instead they are just begging me to comfort him.

The creaking sound of a door opening makes everyone's heads shoot up in the direction of the noise. I look up to see a doctor holding a clipboard to his chest, as he looks around the room. Jacob's arms pull me even closer to him, as he rests his chin on my shoulder.

"Billy isn't doing well," The doctor begins to say, his voice monotone. "But he is awake, and family members can visit him."

Jacob slowly stands up, causing me to stand beside him. He grabs my hand strongly, and then he makes his way to the doctor at the door.

"You don't look like family," The doctor tells me coldly, as he looks at my light skin in comparison to Jacob's.

"She _is _family," Jacob's strong voice takes me and the doctor by surprise. He just said I am family. In a time of pain, I find my heart beating faster.

The doctor looks over at me cautiously, but then looks back to Jacob. "Alright. Follow me then."

"Jacob," Billy's quiet and tired voice comes from the little hospital bed in the corner of the cold room. The floor and walls are white, along with all of the furniture. "Renesmee."

Jacob doesn't say anything; instead he rushes towards Billy's side, pulling me with him. An old hospital chair sits next to the hospital bed, and Jacob falls into it. Jacob lays his head on the bed next to Billy's side, and Billy slowly lifts his hand to place it on Jacob's head. What I am watching almost makes me crumble to the floor, as I see Jacob bawling his eyes out. His hand is still squeezing mine, as tears pour out of his eyes. Tears start streaking down my face fast, as I watch Jacob fall apart.

"It's okay, son," Billy says, as he rubs his head.

Jacob lifts his head off of the bed, and his face is so full of pain that it causes me to cry more. Through his tears Jacob shakes his head, "How is this okay, Dad? Tell me how this is okay!"

Jacob continues to cry violently, as he searches his dad's face for an answer. My knees are shaking, and it's taking all of my strength not to crawl into a corner to cry, just so I don't have to watch this. But I know Jake needs me by his side. Jacob's pain is worse than my own, and now I have to helplessly watch as he falls apart. I want to be able to comfort him, but I know that I can't help right now.

"Trust me," Billy says softly, as he motions me to sit down on the bed. Trying to stop crying, I sit up on the bed right next to Jacob's head. Jacob's hand grabs mine tighter, as he looks up to his dad. "You will be okay."

"But will you, Dad? Will you be able to be okay?" Jacob yells as tears continue to slide down his face.

Billy manages to bring a smile to his lips, "I'm going to be, Jacob. I've had this heart problem for a while. I won't be in pain anymore." His words send me into another soundless cry, as I reach for his free hand. He grabs it tightly, "Maybe it's just my time to go."

"NO! It can't be!" Jacob yells, looking directly at him. "You can't just give up!"

Billy squeezes our hands tighter, "I am not giving up. I've been fighting for many long years now. You two are going to be fine. You will learn to find comfort in each other, and you will be able to grow closer."

"You can't go," Jacob whispers, as he begs him to stay.

All of my thoughts and emotions freeze, as I listen to his voice. There is so much pain and sadness in it and it makes me want to make it all go away. I've never in my whole life seen him in this much pain before. If I wasn't holding onto Billy, I would've run to give Jacob a hug, but I know that he has to deal with this.

"He needs rest and there are more people who wish to see him," The doctor's voice calls from behind us, but we don't budge.

Billy smiles to us, and then kisses both of our hands. "Jacob, I am so proud of what you've become. You have grown up so much, and you helped to bring us all together. I'm so proud to call you my son. And Renesmee, you are such a talented, bright girl. I'm so glad that Jacob has imprinted on you, and I know that you two will be extremely happy in your future. Now let me rest, and I will see you both soon."

"I love you, Dad." Jacob says, almost choking on his tears. He leans up to give Billy a kiss on the forehead, and I do the same.

"I love you, Billy." I tell him, as I wipe the tears that are falling on my cheeks.

Billy smiles brightly at the both of us, "I love you both so much."

Jacob gets up from the chair, and I squeeze his hand tightly. I know that without a pull from me he might not budge, so I take the first steps. He walks with me, and then turns around to see his Dad watching us walk away. When we leave the room, we see Paul and Rachel walking down the hallway. We don't lock eyes, but I know that they can tell we've been crying.

Expecting to go straight down the long hospital hall to go to the ER waiting room, I am surprised when Jacob takes a sharp right. We are in an empty hallway, where at the end is a door for a supply closet. Before I can say anything, Jacob is holding me in his warm embrace. He isn't crying as much as he was, but I know that tears are still rolling down his face. He rests his head on top of mine, and I place my head on his chest.

"Renesmee," He whispers, as he strokes the long ringlets of my hair.

I shush him, as I rub his back. He doesn't need to struggle the right words, when I know what he is feeling. I don't know what words I can say to make him feel better, so instead I just pull him closer to me. I don't know how long we are standing here, just holding each other, but I know that it's at least an hour. We've heard countless footsteps as they visit Billy, and then slowly walk back to the waiting room.

"I love you," Jacob tells me, as he lifts my head up to his with his hand. He places his lips hard on mine, and for a few minutes I let him release some of his pain on me.

When we part after the kiss, I kiss him on the cheek. "I love you, and I am _always _going to be here for you."

"Mr. Black?" A different doctor says a minute later, as Jacob and I are walking back to the waiting room to join the rest. We turn around, and Jacob nods. The doctor looks into his eyes, his own filled with sorrow and pain, "I'm sorry, but your father just passed away."

Those words send my heart aching like I haven't felt before. Jacob leans against a wall, and then slowly slides down to the floor, putting his head in his hands. I automatically sit next to him, and he pulls me into a tight embrace. Tears are sliding down both of our faces, and I watch as his world completely crumbles. It's as if his heart has shattered, and he is trying to hold on to it. He pulls me in, tighter than he has ever before, like he is afraid that I am going to go away, too. What hurts me the most is that I know I can't do anything to fix his grief and sadness, all I can do is to promise to stay in his arms forever.

**A/N: :( i'm sorry but i felt that this was the way that this story had to go. I love Billy's character, but for this story line i decided to take it in this direction. i hope that you aren't mad! I did it for a reason though! It will help Renesmee and Jacob become closer, and Billy was growing old. Please review and hopefully a new chapter will come up by tomorrow! **


	13. Shattered

**A/N: (Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I don't own these characters.) Hey guys! Thank you so much for the support it truly means a lot to me! I can't believe that I already have this many reviews! Each one of them gives me more encouragment to write more! Thank you thank you thank you! I hope that you like this chapter, and please review it! Thank you! **

"My father was such a great man, and I know that we are going to miss very much. Most of you knew him very well since he took a lot of pride in our tribe and village. Many looked up to him as a strong leader, and I know I did. When I was younger after my mother passed away we became a lot closer, and I used to go to him for everything. One day when I was about ten years old, I had fallen off of my bike and I went running into the house. He dropped what he was doing, and ran right over to me. He told me that he would always be there whenever I needed him, and he made me feel better."

Tears roll silently down my face as I watch Jacob talk about Billy. My mother, who flew in with the rest of my family this morning, squeezes my hand gently. Billy's death was only a day ago, and I still can't believe that he is really gone. I just can't imagine not having the wise talks with him anymore.

"I know that I'm always going to miss him, but I know that he is going to be in each and every one of our hearts forever. We will always have the memories of him telling tribe stories at the bonfire in his old wheelchair, and the wise words that he said." Jacob says slowly, a small smile tugging at his lips and my heart almost skips a beat.

He is smiling. He hasn't smiled since we heard Sam yelling for someone to call the hospital. That little smile is letting me know that he will be okay. He will be able to fully smile and be happy again, even when thinking about his father. I know that his mom's death was hard on him, and he hardly ever talks about it, even when I asked. I can't imagine how hard this is on him. Am I selfish being sad about his death when Jacob has just lost his other parent? I can't imagine losing even one of my parents, and now he doesn't have one left. I squeeze my mom's hand tighter, as I realize how lucky I am that they are here with me.

"Even though he is gone, he isn't far away. He will always been in hearts. We need to realize how lucky that we were to have him in our lives, even if the time felt short. I am so proud and lucky to call him my father, because he was a great man. Thank you all for coming." Jacob tells the audience, as his hands grasp the podium tightly. As a single tear rolls down his cheek he takes a deep breath, "I love you, Dad."

I watch as he walks off of the podium, and I clap along with the other people around me. He looks handsome wearing a black tux, but I don't focus on that. I focus on the pain that is in his face. Jake sits down in the empty seat next to me, and grabs my hand tightly with his.

"That was an amazing speech, Jacob." I tell him as I give him a quick kiss on the cheek where the tear landed. "I'm so proud of you."

He squeezes my hand back, and then his dark brown eyes lock on mine. "Thank you and I know your speech is going to be great."

"I love you," I whisper to him, as I stand to my feet. My knee-length black dress is covered in lace, and my hair is pulled into a loose bun. I can almost feel my knees wobbling as I get up to the podium. Jacob asked if I would speak about Billy, and of course I said yes. It means a lot to him, and me. I take a deep breath and then start, "Billy was like my second dad to me. When I was younger and I visited La Push with Jacob, Billy used to place me on his lap and would tell me tribe stories. I never thought about how much that meant to me, until I visited again this year. I had a conversation with him about two days ago and he told me how much he enjoyed me being here. I know how much Billy means to everyone, and it is very sad seeing someone you love leave. Like he told Jacob and me, he isn't in pain anymore. So let's enjoy all of the memories that we have of him, as we show how much we love him. I'm going to miss you, Billy. I love you."

When I am done, I look out into the crowd of familiar faces. All of them are clapping. Members of the pack are crying, including Jacob as he looks at me intently, and people that I don't know from the tribe are either crying or smiling. Rachel and Rebecca, Jacob's two sisters who spoke earlier, are holding tissues up to their eyes. My family members look like they would cry if they could, and I can tell how much it hurts for them, especially my mom who used to talk to Billy all the time. It's hard talking about someone, especially at their funeral, but I know that I wanted to.

"Thank you," Jacob whispers to me as I sit down next to him in the rows. He grabs my hand, and places it in-between his two hands. Tears are rolling down his face, and I know that it's the same for me. We watch as a member of the tribe goes up to speak about Billy, and Jacob brings me in closer to him.

All I want to do is make his pain go away, but I know that I'm not going to be able to fix this. I might be able to help stitch him back together, but I can't stop the hurt from coming. He just lost his father, and it's okay for him to be sad about it. I can't imagine losing my own father, and even the thought of it makes me tear up. My parents told me that a down side about being immortal is that you have to watch the ones you love die, as you stay the same. I never thought about how much it would hurt when we lost someone. I've never felt this type of pain before, and I'm not sure if I can deal with it over and over again.

Jacob is going to be with me through it all, though. He will be the person that I go to, and he will want to try to make all the pain go away. We will always be here to comfort the other, and that makes me sigh a sigh of relief. I don't think that I could make it through my pain without Jacob to help me. He's my other half, and even if he doesn't know what to do to make me feel better, all he has to do is be here with me.

The rest of the funeral goes on slowly, as I grip to Jacob for strength while tears roll down my face. I'm still holding on tight to him, as we sit in the limo on the way to the gravesite. I don't know if I'm ready to say goodbye to Billy for good. It was only a day or two ago when we had the talk about my future, and now he is gone. Jacob and I don't speak as the limo driver opens the door and lets us and my family out. We follow the crowd as we make our way through the graveyard, and I cling tighter to Jake.

When we get to Billy's grave stone Jacob and I stand in the back as people place flowers down on it. When most of the people are done, Jacob squeezes my hand, and we make our way up to it. We both kneel down, and Jacob places the flower bouquet so it is leaning against the stone.

"Goodbye Dad," Jacob whispers to the stone, and then he starts to cry more. He wraps an arm around me, and we both cry in each other's arms. "I love you."

I take a deep breath, and try to recompose myself. Billy's smile comes to my mind, and a smile tugs at my lips. "Bye, Billy, I love you."

I can tell that it takes everything Jacob has to stand up from the ground, and to go back into the crowd. I stand still as we watch his sisters, the pack, and members from the tribe say their goodbyes. Jacob is shaking, and I wrap my arms around his waist. He has had an extremely emotional past few days, and I can tell that he is on the urge of breaking down.

We aren't on the site very long, but the ride home feels like it takes hours. The people who are in the same limo as us say sorry to Jacob on the way home, and Jacob thanks them politely. It's nice to see how many lives Billy touched. I know that Billy will never really be gone, like Jacob said, he is in so many hearts. When the limo pulls up to the Black's house, I can feel Jacob tensing up between my arms. We step out of the limo and as it drives away, we stand still, staring at the house.

Billy left this house, and everything that belongs in it to Jacob. In his Will, I know that Billy left more items to Jacob, but I don't know what they are. I tear my eyes off of the old, red house, and up into Jacob's face. His eyes are red and vacant, as he stares at his home. We've been in the house since Billy died, but now it feels different. Everything in this house will remind Jacob and me of Billy, and I know that is going to be hard.

"Did you want to go in?" I ask him, as I wrap my arms around his waist. A strong arm slides over my shoulder, and he pulls me in closer to him.

Jacob stays silent for a while, but I know that he will answer when he can. His voice comes out a whisper, and if I wasn't a vampire I probably wouldn't be able to hear it. "I'm going to have to someday."

"I'm here," I remind him, as I rub his back. "I'll be with you the whole time."

With that Jacob starts walking over to the house, not letting me go as we enter it. The house is just like Billy and Jake left it: messy. Dishes are in the sink, and newspapers cover the countertops. Tonight is not the time to clean it, though. Jacob doesn't stop; instead he walks straight to his room, and closes the door behind us.

"Renesmee," Jacob whispers softly, as he walks over to where I am standing in his room. He wraps his strong arms around me, and he pulls me in tightly. He lowers his head down to kiss me on the forehead, and I feel that electricity bolt surge through me. I pull backwards in his tight grip, and I look up to his face. Without words, he leans down to touch his lips to mine. He places his hand on the back of my head, and he brings me in tighter to his mouth. His lips go along my jaw line, and down my neck. He stops suddenly, "We need sleep."

I nod in agreement, half dizzy from kissing him and half emotionally drained from today. I feel guilty for feeling the electricity bolts in a time like this, but I know that Jacob needed that.

He walks over to his bed, and slumps into it. "I'll go sleep on the couch tonight. You need good sleep," I tell him sadly, not wanting to leave him, but he does need sleep.

"No," His voice breaks as he reaches out for me. "I need you here with me, and I'll sleep better with you here. Please don't leave."

The desperation in his voice makes my heart feel like it is broken in a million different pieces. His own pain shatters my world, and I almost cry again. With just a few words he can make me never, ever want to leave his side. "I'm not leaving you," I whisper as I walk over to where he is laying.

I lay down on his bed, and he wraps his arms around me. He pulls me in close, as I lay on his chest with most of my upper body. We lay here silently as he absent-mindedly strokes his hand through my bronze curls. We don't need to say anything to know that we both are on the same page. We've gone through a lot these past few days, and I know that it will only make us closer. So I just hold him as his world is shattered into a million pieces, and I try to help him put it all back together. I know that it will be a while until Jacob heals from this, but I know that we will be okay. Billy was a wise and loving man, and he told us that himself. Until he heals from this pain, I have to be the light in his world and I am willing to stay in his arms as long as that takes.


	14. Pictures & a Message

**A/N: Sorry it took a little bit! I wasn't sure what I wanted to happen for this chapter, but I eventually went with this. I hope you like it! & Ahhh! I can't believe I almost have 30 reviews! That is sooo crazy to me! (: thank you thank you thank you. Please review this chapter & I hope you enjoy (: (p.s. sorry it's kind of short, but i didn't want to keep you waiting)  
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"Renesmee, come look at this," Jacob's low voice calls me from the other side of the living room. "It was my dad's."

Ever since the funeral, which was a few days ago, Jacob has rarely spoke to anyone, including me. I know that he needs time to think, so I haven't been pushing him to talk to me. I just feel that he will talk when he is ready, so I've been by his side, standing quietly next to him. Today we've been going through the items in the house that used to belong to Billy, and Jacob's voice startles me since I haven't heard it in a while.

I slowly get up from the couch, placing the box filled of miscellaneous objects that I was sorting through, onto the coffee table. I walk over to where Jacob is sitting, and I take a seat next to him. In his hand is a worn out photo album with his last name on the cover. "Where'd you find this?"

"It was on the bottom of the book shelf," He tells me, his eyes never leaving the album. A few minutes pass until he finally looks up from the album, and into his eyes. "I don't know if I can do it, yet."

I lean my head onto his shoulder, and he wraps his arm around my waist. "If you feel like you aren't ready yet, then don't do it. It will be here later."

"No, I think I need to look at them." He says after a few moments of silence, and then he draws a deep breath before opening the first page.

A very tan little boy with short black hair smiles at us in the first picture that we see. Underneath, Jacob's name is scribbled with his age –five years old. I smile brightly at the young boy who had no clue what his life was going to turn into, "You were so cute, Jake."

Taking another deep breath he flips the page again, opening up to two new pictures. On the left page two young girls with long, black hair put into braids are smiling into the camera and I know that its Jacob's two sisters when they were younger. When I look at the picture on the right page I almost don't recognize the older man in it. The man is standing up, with a young Jacob riding on his back. It isn't until I read the name underneath the picture that I realize its Billy. This must have been before he was put into his wheelchair.

"This was on my sixth birthday," Jacob says, pulling me in closer to him. "The new bike that I had just gotten is lying in the mud in the background."

I smile as I look at the happiness on both of their faces. "You looked like you were having fun," I whisper lightly.

"We had a lot of fun," He tells me, and out of the corners of my eyes I can see a smile tugging at his lips.

For the next hour I watch as Jacob flips through the pages, each one has a new picture and a new story to tell. One picture of his mom and dad together with him and his sisters caused tears to roll down his cheeks, and it caused my own tears to come. Seeing Jacob in so much pain like he is now causes my own pain. I just held him until he was ready to continue looking.

"What's this?" Jacob asks, as he flips the last page of pictures over and finds a sheet of folded paper. His hands start to shake as he sees what is written on the outside of the paper. The words 'to Jacob, love Dad' are scribbled in Billy's messy writing, and I realize that he must have left a note for Jake.

I watch silently, as Jacob struggles to open up the letter. Not because it is taped or sealed, but because he is afraid what will be written. He is afraid that it will cause him to break down. In all of the years that I have known Jake, I've learned that he isn't one to fall apart for anything. The closest I have seen him is whenever he has had to leave me for a short period, and that wasn't anything near this.

When Jacob opens the note, he holds it so I can read it, too:

_ Jacob, I am so proud to call you my son. These past years I have watched you grow from a young kid to a strong, brave man. You have had to deal with many tough struggles in your life, and you handle them with such grace –usually. Of course, you have a pretty bad temper, but we can blame that on you being a wolf half the time. I remember when Sam told me that you were Alpha for your own pack...I was so proud of you. Remember, son, that you will do great things. I know that at first I wasn't a fan of you becoming friends with Bella, because she was friends with the Cullens, but I am glad because it brought us all together. I'm going to say a few things about Renesmee, because she is such a big part of your life now. Hold on to her, son, because she is such a lovely young lady. I know that just by hearing her speak your day becomes brighter. Imprinting might be so we can pass the wolf gene, but something is telling me that your imprint is much stronger than that. It is the final connection between our tribe and the Cullens, and if you choose to make a family then you will create a whole new species. I can tell that you make her happier, too. Will you do me a favor, son? If you have kids tell them about their old Grandpa Billy. Let them know how much I love them even though I'll never see them. The doctor has told me I don't have much time left, but I'm not letting that stop me doing anything that I want to do. You know me, I'm all for the action. I may not be as hip as you kids are, but I sure have enjoyed your company. Jacob, be strong. Even if I am gone, that doesn't mean that I am not right here with you. I don't know when you will read this, but just know how much I love you. Love with all of your heart, and learn to be truly happy. Don't feel guilty if you are happy right now where you are, because I don't want to take your happiness. Hopefully when you think of me on laughs will come to mind. I know that your future is bright, and I love you. –Billy. _

When I am finished reading the note it leaves me speechless. I never knew how much Billy loved Jacob –and me, and that he knew that his time was running short. I want to cry, but my eyes have cried too many tears this week. Instead, I feel a smile pulling at my lips. Billy was a great man, and such a great father to Jake. He wrote this to comfort Jacob, so he doesn't feel guilty for being happy.

"There is no way he can be gone," Jacob says, folding the note and placing it in the back pocket of his jeans. "The weirdest thing is that I'm not crying. When I opened that letter I thought I was going to break down again, but no tears are coming."

I turn my head up, so I am staring into his brown eyes. I smile, "Even though I am still missing him like crazy, I feel like that note has closed my tears. I know that I will cry in the future about this, but I feel like he stopped them from coming now."

"How is that you know what I'm thinking?" He asks me, picking me up and placing me in his lap. "Do you want to dance?"

Dance? The randomness of his question confuses me, and I intertwine my fingers in between his. "Why dance?"

"I feel like we haven't done anything to be happy about, and my dad's letter really woke me up. We still have to be happy, and you are the happiest thing in my life." Jacob says, slowly standing up and bringing me with him. "Plus, we haven't danced together before."

I giggle as he wraps his arms around my waist, and I wrap mine across his neck. "Jacob Black, I love you."

"I love you, too." He says with a smile, and then places his lips on mine. After a minute, we break apart.

I get up on my tiptoes, and try to reach his ear so I can whisper, "We don't have any music."

"We don't need music," He says with a wink, and then starts spinning in circles. I laugh as he grabs my hand, and starts spinning me.

As I am spinning into his arms, I find us both laughing more than we have in a long time. It gives me comfort knowing that we will be okay, and even in this time of what seems like complete darkness, we find the light in each other. I feel like Billy knew how much this would affect us, and how he could use his words to make us feel so better. When Jacob pulls me in closer to him, and I find myself staring into his eyes I find what is keeping me here. Through all of the times that we will have together, whether tough or happy, I know that he will always be there with me.


	15. Lunch at the Cliffs

**A/N: (disclaimer: i am NOT stephenie meyer, and i don't own the characters or any part of the twilight series) hey guys! sorry these are getting spaced out! my birthday is today, so it's been a pretty busy last few days! i hope you enjoy this, and it's sort of a filler, but it's nice and cute. thank you for the reviews! please, please review if you read this! thank you again!(: **

"You have handled this past week very well."

Slowly I look up to see my father walking through the woods, and over to where I am currently sitting. My family and I decided to go hunting outside of La Push today so we wouldn't have to deal with our thirst. Jacob couldn't come since he is dealing with things about Billy, so I decided that I would get some time to myself. Too bad I didn't think that my parents would be all over me. I miss them, though. I haven't seen them in a while.

"We miss you, too." Dad tells me quietly, as he stops in his place. "If you want free time, I can leave."

I shake my head, as I pat the warm ground next to me. "I guess if anyone understands my thoughts better than Jacob, it'd be you."

"He will be okay," He tells me, as he leans against the tree that my back is leaning against. "I know that is what you are worrying about. He misses him more than I can even describe, but it doesn't compare to the happiness that you give him. Luckily, Billy is taking up most of thoughts so I haven't wanted to kill him yet. It's only when he looks at you, I fight the urge to strangle him. I must admit, when I came I wasn't happy. He took you away from us, but he did give us almost seventeen years with you."

I sigh deeply as I realize that I didn't even think about how my parents would react to this, but then I realize that I don't need their approval. They knew that this was going to happen, and I'm old enough to know what I want. Plus Jacob will never leave me, so they have nothing to worry about.

"Seventeen years feels like two when you have forever to live." My dad says quiet enough so only I can hear.

I want to roll my eyes at my father being over protective again, but I know that he is telling the truth. It has seemed to fly by so quickly and sometimes it gets overwhelming. "He hasn't taken me away from you. I'm still your daughter."

"It's been a battle since the day you were born to keep you with us." He tells me sadly, as he looks off into the woods.

Ever since I can remember Jacob has been with me. I remember one day when I wanted to go hunting with Jacob, but my family wanted me to spend a whole day with them. I cried for a while, and then reluctantly went with my family. My parents looked so hurt. "I still love you."

"I know that you never wanted to hurt us, but it was hard to watch him taking you away. He waited long enough, though. You are almost your mother's age when I met her." My dad tells me with a smile tugging at his lips. "I just wanted to tell you that I can't imagine anyone else I would rather have be with you."

I lean my body against his cold body, and rest my head on his shoulder. "Thanks dad, it means a lot."

"Anytime, Renesmee," He kisses me on top of the forehead, and then stands up quickly. "Did you want to go back?"

He has a look on his face like he knows something that I don't. I grab his hand, and he lifts me up. "Sure."

We walk through the trees, until we find my mom who just finished a deer. With a smile she grabs my father's hand, and we start running through the woods. Suddenly, my favorite smell enters my senses, and I freeze. Jacob is here!

"Hey Nessie," I hear Jacob's deep, loving voice before I see him emerge from the dense trees. When I see him he is just wearing his normal jean cutoffs, and a slight grin that is on his face.

I watch as my parents continue to walk through the forest, not even looking back to check if I'm okay. I'm guessing that they planned this, and I couldn't be happier. Jacob and I haven't been away from the stress for about a week now, and we could use a good afternoon of hanging out.

"Hi Jake," I tell him with a grin, as he wraps his arms around my waist. He gives me a quick kiss, and then stares at me. "What?"

He just continues to stare deep into my eyes, and I start to feel light headed. Somehow he can make me feel like I am going to faint by just looking at me. I know that I will never get tired of this feeling. I wrap my arms around his neck, and he places his lips on my forehead. "Do you want to go on a picnic?"

"A picnic?" I ask him slightly confused, as I bite my lip. "It's kind of out of the blue, Jake. I would love to, but we don't have any food or anything for a pic-."

He silences me by placing his lips hard on mine. "There is a basket waiting for us on the cliffs."

"You've been planning this?" I ask him, as I stand up on my tip toes to trying to level myself with him. It doesn't work though, since he is seven feet tall and I'm more than a foot shorter than him.

He nods, as he pulls me up by my waist so my stomach is on his chest. I'm a little higher up than him, and I run a hand through his hair. "Yes, I felt that we needed to get away for a little."

"I couldn't agree more," I tell him, as he places me on the ground.

Within minutes we have arrived at the cliff edge, and I find myself staring down into the ocean waves that are crashing against the rock. I've never been able to jump the cliffs before, because my parents always thought that it was too dangerous for me to do. How could it be dangerous for me, a half vampire, when humans do it all the time? Sometimes I'll never understand my parents. But right now isn't about them. It's about the amazing guy who is laying out the blanket a foot away.

"Can you back up a little, Ness? It's making me nervous." Jacob's voice comes from behind me, and I can hear all of the stress and tension.

I turn around to face him, my back to the ocean, and I smile at him, "You do remember that I'm a half vampire right?"

"That doesn't mean you get to look over the edge of a cliff," He tells me with a grin, and then pats the ground next to him.

I walk over to the red blanket that he is sitting on, and I sit down right next to him. He grabs the picnic basket, and places it in front of us. The old wooden box is barely closed due to all of the food in it, and when Jacob opens it food almost flies everywhere.

"I want to stay here in La Push longer," Jacob tells me, as he grabs the different already made sandwiches out of the basket. "I don't know how long, but I can't go back tomorrow. I just feel like I need to stay here longer."

I watch as he avoids my eyes, and pretends to be focused on the food. I might have shrugged that tiny detail off, but it's Jake, and I know what it means. He is afraid I am going to want to go home and leave him. "I'll stay as long as you stay."

"Your family will miss you," He tells me, as he fiddles with the bowls filled with fruit.

"I know they will, and I will miss them so much." I say softly, and I see him quickly glance out of the corner of his eyes. "That won't compare to the pain of missing you, though."

He places his hand, palm up, on my knee and I place my hands on his. Our fingers intertwine, as Jacob thinks about what to do. He releases his hand from mine, and places my own hand on his knee. With his middle finger he traces the lines in my palm, and I feel like I am going to faint. I can't tell if he is absent-mindedly doing it, or if it on purpose. Either way I don't mind.

"Why do I feel like the bad guy?"

My happy mood suddenly deflates, like a balloon that has a hole in it, as I hear the sadness in his voice. He shouldn't ever feel like what he is doing is wrong, and the last thing I would want is to him to feel bad or guilty about being with me. How could he be the bad guy? A bad guy causes pain to someone, and all he has brought is happiness.

"Jake, you are _not _a bad guy." I warn him, as I clamp my hand over his hand that is still tracing my palm. My small, tiny hands are wrapped around his tough, calloused hand.

He looks up into my eyes, and all of his emotions are poured into me. He can't hide anything from me with those deep eyes. "I'm taking you away from everything you have."

"You are everything," I tell him, knowing that it is a cheesy but true. With Jacob gone… I don't know what I would do. Eventually I would have to move on, but right now I can't even imagine it.

We spend a few minutes silently sitting there, him tracing my palm, as I stare out into the ocean with my head resting on his shoulder. I thought that the point of this picnic was so we didn't have to stress.

"Let's jump off of the cliff," I say suddenly, as I pull my head off of him.

He looks at me like I am crazy, and he shakes his head violently. "No way, Ness. What if you get hurt?"

"I won't, because we are jumping off together." I tell him with a smile, as I jump up off the blanket and try to pull him up with me.

His strong grip doesn't let me pull him up, and instead he pulls me onto him. Quickly, he is lying down on the grass, and I am lying on his chest. His smiles mischievously, and then crashes his lips on mine. For a few minutes, my mind begins to wander and then I realize what he is doing.

I place my hand on his chest, and I push up lightly. "No, you are not distracting me. No matter how much I want to kiss you right now. We are jumping off this cliff, Jacob."

"Why?" He asks confused as he props his self up on his elbows, grinning from ear to ear.

I shrug, as I walk over to the edge of the cliff. I place my feet halfway off, so I'm balancing on the arch of my feet. Strong hands grab my hips, and he pulls me back so I'm fully on the ground.

"You are going to jump whether I go or not, aren't you?" He asks me, placing his chin on my head. I nod, as I continue to stare out into the bright blue sky. He chuckles loudly, "Fine. We'll do it."

He grabs my hand tightly, and we back up a few feet. He looks at me, making sure this is what I want to do, and I nod with a bright smile. He nods along with me, and then we turn to the ocean. At the same time, we start running forward, each step bringing us closer to the edge. Suddenly, I realize that there is no ground underneath my feet. I am falling in the air, holding Jacob, as we are engulfed in the cold water. It's the biggest adrenaline rush that I've had in a while, and I'm glad that Jacob jumped with me.


End file.
